Category Archives: current affairs

Today's Cartoons

There are some rather amusing (no, not side-splittingly funny, just rather amusing) cartoons in today’s Times, all making political comment on these trying times. As the Times doesn’t print most of them, I naughtily reproduce them here; ownership remains with the Times, of course.

First Peter Brookes …

And then three pocket cartoons …

Predictions for 2009

I’ve found a number of websites which purport to predict what will happen in 2009; for instance here, here and here. All of this looks to me like fairly non-specific commonsense readings of how the prevailing circumstances may develop, which anyone can do.

On that basis, and based partly on these predictions but mainly on my own hunches, here is my reading of what might happen in 2009.

  1. There will be an assassination attempt (possibly more than one) on Barack Obama after his inauguration as US President. There is an evens chance it will succeed.
  2. The Euro will continue to weaken against the dollar; in consequence both France and Germany may threaten to leave the Euro system. Conversely, due to its weak economy, the UK may try again to join the Euro in the mistaken belief it will make things better; it won’t. If this succeeds it will spell a further major downturn in the UK as businesses attempt to use the conversion as a means of increasing their margins at the expense of the customer.
  3. If Gordon Brown makes another major miscalculation (either in terms of policy or the public’s mood) he will be forced out of office resulting in an early General Election. The result will be a hung parliament with a minority Labour government, which because it is unable to get legislation through will end up deepening the economic woes of the UK. However if Gordon Brown escapes further miscalculations the General Election will be between March and May 2010, with the Labour government being returned to office.
  4. Russia will swing back towards Communism and the corruption that goes with it. This leads to a worsening of relations between the US and Russia, with interesting knock-on effects on the US space programme (NASA could abandon manned space exploration).
  5. There will be a major pollution event which threatens thousands of lives somewhere in the world during the year, possibly in France, Spain or India.
  6. There is also likely to be a major dam rupture killing thousands. This will probably be in the Far East (China is most likely). The appropriate government will be accused of not doing enough, quickly enough, to help but in practice it doesn’t care about losing a few thousand of its people. The dam will not be repaired due to the geology and the high cost.
  7. Having had years of drought there will be heavy rains and major flooding across large areas of Australia.
  8. Britain sees a number of its top companies fail; the holiday, aviation, automotive and construction sectors are most at risk. Of the airlines Alitalia, Ryanair and bmi look vulnerable, as do BA and airport operator BAA.
  9. There will be at least two further failures (or at the least major restructurings) amongst the major High Street retailers; choose from Dixons, Morrisons, Halfords, Primark, Iceland, B&Q, Boots, Superdrug, T.K.Maxx. At least two of the top 10 UK supermarket chains will fail and/or merge.
  10. At least one UK High Street bank will also fail. It will not be rescued by the UK government, who will also not allow it to be absorbed by any of the big four banks.
  11. Work will start on the third runway at Heathrow; however it will be abandoned after little more than 2 years (and with upwards of £5bn wasted) due to a major downturn in the aviation sector worldwide.
  12. 2009 will also see the start of serious international lobbying to move the 2012 Olympics away from London in favour of an existing, cheaper, venue – all due to the worldwide economic downturn. A final decision will not be made until late in 2010 or early 2011; it could go either way.
  13. A well known celebrity (possibly Victoria Beckham) will become pregnant with a long awaited daughter, but she will have a life-threatening miscarriage.
  14. On a global note, Pakistan and Iran will continue to be a threat to world peace with both being driven further into the arms of Islamic extremists.
  15. The global economy will continue to have a very bumpy ride in 2009 with a level of stability returning sometime after mid-2010. However this stability will be at a lower level than heretofore as there is a growing global realisation amongst the people that our previous greed has generated the current cycle of gloom. Governments and business leaders will however not see this and will continue to try to ramp economies back to their pre-2008 levels; they will fail.
  16. There is no indication of any truly major earthquake or volcanic event in 2009; the catastrophically big events are still 2-3 years away. That is not to say there won’t be earthquake events, just that they will not be the cataclysmic ones we are all awaiting.

So there you have it – a mixture of my reading of the current environment and some wishful thinking dressed up as a set of predictions. See anyone can do this based on absolutely nothing and it looks authoritative. I hope I have this all wrong (there is no reason it should be right; I have no known special psychic powers) as it is so gloomy. But I shall claim a triumph if I score anything over a 30% hit rate.

Zen Mischief Awards for 2008

Here is my personal Honours List for 2008:

Most Annoying Person of the Year: Gordon Brown (together with the whole of the current Cabinet)

Most Dangerous Person of the Year: A tie between Robert Mugabe and George W Bush

Most Boring Event of the Year: Beijing Olympics

Biggest National Disaster of the Year: Government bailout of the banks

Star of the Year: Noreen – for her book, Dictionary of Children’s Clothes, and for still being married to me!

Person with the Least Clue this Year: Gordon Brown

Personal Achievements this Year: (a) I’m still working, (b) I lost 30Kg

Personal Highlight of the Year: Short Break in Germany in February

Personal Lowlights of the Year: (a) Current work project, (b) no major holiday for the second year running, (c) lack of time for the Anthony Powell Society, my family or myself, (d) I put back on 3-4 Kg having lost it.

Personal Unfulfilled Dreams this Year: (a) No golden handshake, (b) no big lottery win, (c) can’t yet retire in comfort.

Medieval Credit Crunch

I always knew there’s nothing new under the sun, but I hadn’t really expected to find out that there was a true medieval credit crunch. But according to News for Medievalists there were indeed problems with the banking system at the time of Edward I in the 1290s. There is indeed nothing new!

Life after Shopping

The Times; 29/12/2008Today we did something unusual for us — we went shopping, together, to one of our nearby town centres. It could just be the last time we ever do this, given the current economic climate. And also given what we found …

The art shop we particularly went for was shut — for stocktaking; not advised on their website! Unsurprisingly T.K.Maxx were selling cheap clothes and Christmas leftovers; unenticing. Everywhere was much emptier than expected, except Costa Coffee which was full. Coming up for lunchtime and there was hardly a queue for the cashiers in the bank. Woolworth’s was shut; gone. Adams were selling everything at 50% off — not surprising as they won’t be there much longer. I noticed several other closed or boarded up shops. M&S food was only 75% stocked. Noreen wanted some jeans from M&S; no chance of anything she’d wear. WH Smith looked as if it had been ravaged by a herd of hungry wildebeest followed by a troop of starved chimpanzees — oh, sorry they were the shoppers, mostly from the local council estate! Smiths had no newspapers worth reading but thousands of trashy magazines; and coloured pens etc. in at least four different places in the shop. The indoor market was empty.

On the plus side? I eventually found most of the stuff I wanted in Smith’s and a newspaper at the kiosk by the station; I was in an out of the bank in 5 minutes; we were home in time to make our own lunch rather than eat out; and we got the afternoon to do naff all as well. Modified rapture!

Sadly I fear (and I hope I’m wrong) this is the way 2009 is going — downhill all the way. Which puts Libby Purves’s article in today’s Times in interesting perspective. I’m not going to try to precis the article (that would be a stern test for even a master of English language), so follow the link and read it for yourselves. Suffice it to say that the article headings read:

The high street must find life after shopping
We need to rediscover the pleasures of old-fashioned street life, where spending is not the only way to enjoy ourselves

Re-reading that out of context is slightly mind-boggling! Are we really being enjoined to bring back such pleasures as the apprentice boys playing football with a pigs bladder (also known as a yoof brawl) or the ladies of the night? Still I suppose at least the latter do keep money moving round the economy.

Oliver Postgate RIP

Oliver Postgate, creator (with Peter Firmin) of many seminal and brilliant children’s cartoons, has died at the age of 83.

Postgate’s first creation was Ivor the Engine (in 1958), followed many, many others including Noggin the Nog, The Clangers and the universally loved Bagpuss. Although I never saw these as a kid (my enlightened(?) parents refused to have one of these “appalling peddlers of trash” TVs until I was at university) I found both Bagpuss and The Clangers as an adult. I loved them and I still do, to the extent that some of the “catch phrases” have become a part of our ecolect, notably “the mice on the mouse organ”, “Professor Yaffle”, “the Soup Dragon” and “Blue String Pudding”.

Here is not the place to write a full scale obituary, but you can find more about Oliver Postgate and his work at:

I have to admit to agreeing with Sarah Vine in the last of those linked pages, that this should be a national day of mourning. The world needs more Like Oliver Postgate.

Only the English

Last Sunday, Joff Summerfield arrived in Greenwich on his penny-farthing having left there 2½ years earlier by the same mode of transport. In the intervening time he has peddled his penny-farthing round the world at a rate of up to 40 miles a day, all in aid of charity. Joff Summerfield is, of course, English.

Summerfield was interviewed on BBC TV Breakfast this morning:

Presenter: Are you the first person to do this?
JS: No, I’m actually the second. The previous person did it over 100 years ago.
Presenter: How long did it take him?
JS: About the same as it took me.

In fact Summerfield claims he is the first person to achieve this feat since Thomas Stevens, who was also English, in 1884-7, although he started and ended in San Francisco.

Apparently the thing people most asked him was “Why?”, which seems hardly suprising! His reply? “It’s pretty much what we English do. It’s an adventure.” The mammoth tour was his third attempt at circumnavigation on a penny-farthing.

Oh and along the way he also came second in the novice category of the Penny-Farthing World Championships.

More on Banking Bailouts

Just a couple of snippets of thought following on from my post of yesterday

BBC Breakfast this morning was reporting on the £400bn pledged by the government for yesterday’s bailout. First of all they insist it is £400bn, not £500bn, as was reported yesterday. How? Why? Well it seems the missing £100bn had already been pledged, so was not new money. More government prestidigitation.

But no matter, Breakfast had calculated that £400bn amounts to £13,ooo for every UK taxpayer. Now how do the government think the “average” taxpayer is going to find £13,000? I am lucky in that I earn around twice the national average wage, which means I pay £7,500-ish in income tax every year (or £600 a month). And whilst I would love to pay much less tax, I see the equity in what I do pay, given that we have to pay at all. (That doesn’t mean I agree with where it is all squandered, sorry spent wisely.) But another £13,000!! Even over two years that means my income tax would double. Now translate that into the effect on someone earning say £20,000 a year and who pays maybe £3000 in income tax. Where do they find all that additional money?

Oh sorry, that;’s OK because they now become poor; below the bread-line. So they can claim benefits. But wait! Where do those benefits come from? Our tax take. So those of us left paying tax get shafted for even more. Ad infinitum. You see what I mean about spirals of debt and destruction?!?!?

Jilly in response to my post of yesterday makes an good point — well several actually. Banking was always smoke and mirrors. Which explains why the medieval Jews so despised; they were operating in an environment where people could still see through the smoke and they didn’t like the (distorting) mirrors that were left? The Emperor’s new suit was seen for what it was. It is just that in recent years, well at least during my lifetime, the smoke has gotten increasingly dense to hide the ever more distorting mirrors.

It’s tempting to blame Mrs Thatcher for all this, with her philosophy that everyone must own their own house, thereby needing a mortgage and generating increasing debt — not to mention the increasing wealth of those years with the instant gratification made possible by having more readily available money. While Mrs Thatcher undoubtedly didn’t help, I think the root cause goes further back: to the spendthrift Labour governments of Harold Wilson and James Callaghan, both of whom spent more than we could afford.

Jilly also makes the point that credit controls should never have been abolished. Well up to a point, Lord Copper. While ideally borrowing only what one can immediately afford to repay is an excellent philosophy, it does mean there is only ever a very constrained money supply. Hence there would be no growth. The controls had to be loosened somewhat to fund growth and an entrepreneurial spirit, otherwise we would still be living in a grim post-war environment. But arguable we have taken progress too far, too fast; maybe a change from a money supply ratio of 1:1 to the current 1:27-ish was a step too far; perhaps a ratio of 1:5 or 1:10 would have been more realistic?

But then 20/20 hindsight is a wonderful thing. We are where we are and somehow we have to get out of it. I just have grave misgivings that the current spiral of debt to pay off debt is a good way. But then from where we are there probably isn’t a pretty solution. But then, again as Jilly points out, we don’t appear to have learnt any of the lessons of history. Plus ça change!

Banking by Mirrors

Yet again the British taxpayer is being fleeced to prop up the banking system; the UK government has today announced a package of measures which could cost the taxpayers £500bn … or around £10,000 for every man, woman and child in the country. BBC News story.

We know this whole thing is a mirage; money is no more than pieces of paper which are worth only the value of the ink printed on them. But would this happen if the government had to do all this in actual gold? I doubt it. For a start there isn’t that much gold. As I understand it the capitalisation ratio is generally somewhere in the region of 1:25 to 1:30 (ie. 25-30 times as much money supply as there is real money, aka. gold). If we all wanted to draw our money from the banks we couldn’t; there physically isn’t even enough paper to do it! It’s all electronic bits somewhere.

Notwithstanding that I do seriously wonder what these people are on! What are they doing? Basically they are making an ever increasing mountain of debt to service the debt mountain which already exists! And they can’t see it! For instance £250bn will be available to the banks as loan guarantees for lending between banks! So Bank A borrows money from Bank B, with a loan guarantee from the government. Bank A fails and defaults on the loan, so the government pays off Bank B. So here now is a government debt, taken on to service a loan which is probably being used to cover Bank A’s debt to Bank C. Is this a sensible way to run a business? Or an economy? Or a country? I don’t think so!

Worse … “Banks will have to increase their capital by at least £25bn and can borrow from the government to do so”. Que? Banks need more money, to service their debt. How do they get more money. They borrow it from the government (ie. you and me the taxpayers). Borrowing money to pay off debt. Isn’t this how loan sharks operate? Isn’t this the whole basis of usury, for which the medieval Jews were so vilified?

Ah good! The FTSE as I write is down around 4%. So the money markets don’t entirely believe this either! And neither it appears do the investors in some banks as their shares are down too.

But it’s all a mirage. A house of cards built out of mirrors. And I feel sure it will come tumbling down. The only trouble is when it does it will be a whole lot worse than it would have been had the markets been left alone now to sort themselves out. I’ve been saying for years it’s all over-hyped. The FTSE is a con; at best it should never have been above 3000. The end of the world is nigh. But fortunately most of us won’t survive to witness it, but it might be an unpleasant end game.

Deep Thought from Osho

I’ve recently picked up a couple of books by the mystic teacher Osho* and have been flicking through them. This is from his volume Intimacy; it seems strangely relevant:

This society is a power-oriented society. This society is still utterly primitive, utterly barbarian. A few people – politicians, priests, professors – are dominating millions. And this society is run in such a way that no child is allowed to have intelligence. It is a sheer accident that once in a while a Buddha arrives on the earth […] Somehow, once in a while a person escapes from the clutches of society. Once in a while a person remains unpoisoned by society. That must be because of some error, some mistake of society. Otherwise society succeeds […] in destroying your trust in yourself. And once that is done, you will never be able to trust anybody.

* Better known to those of us brought up on a diet of 60s/70s culture as Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh.