If you think you are too small or insignificant to make a difference, then you have never been in bed with a mosquito
[Dalai Lama]
Squashed Buttered Nuts
Noreen bought a book yesterday. I stole it. I stole it because it contains such twinkly brilliant gems as:
Bottled at Source. Abbey Well, Highland Spring, Glenpatrick, Ty Nant Welsh Spring, Pennine (bottled at source in Huddersfield) … Apparently, you can’t walk more than a hundred yards in the UK without falling into a natural spring, an Ice Age glacier, a gushing source of healing, sparkling spring water or a 400-year-old magical fairytale wishing well with purifying pixies, adjacent sandstone filter, bottling plant and market-research department.
Mozzarella. Mozzarella cheese comes in Silly Putty-shaped shiny balls … It tastes of nothing. Mozzarella is stored in those unsettling little water-filled tubs – displayed like some sort of soft-cheese Petri-dish specimen …
Muffins. Since when did it become acceptable to eat fairy cakes for breakfast? … You can keep the modern breakfast muffin. I’ll take the fairy cake any day. Not one of those chi-chi chain coffee shop cupcakes; a proper fairy cake, one with icing and those edible rice-paper cake-toppers in the shape of Mickey Mouse’s face, that crab thing from The Little Mermaid, the Wuzzles or the Popples.
Pacific-Rim Cooking. More fucking mangoes.
At several chuckles, sniggers or snorts a page Sausage in a Basket: The Great British Book of How Not to Eat by Martin Lampen is a must. If, like me, you loathe false food or if you just desire an amusement for that transatlantic flight, then this book will not disappoint.
Pavement Liverwort
Liverwort, originally uploaded by kcm76.I was in Pinner today to see my hypnotherapist. When I left I was surprised to spot this this roughly 150mm across patch of liverwort growing among the the paving slabs and general detritus. I’m no expert on liverworts although I think this is a common one, but still a nice surprise find.
Rye Photos
More photos of our trip to Rye on my Flickr Photostream.
Absolute Tits
Thanks to Bystander at The Magistrate’s Blog, I just have to share this from the Daily Telegraph without comment . I’m not sure whether to laugh, cry or despair!
Quotes of the Week
This week’s crop of the profound and amusing.
When we remember that we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
[Mark Twain]Skeptical scrutiny is the means, in both science and religion, by which deep insights can be winnowed from deep nonsense.
[Carl Sagan]As an atheist I do not believe that there is a God in fact, but the fact of the beliefs of others that God is is highly consequential. It is less important what the real Islam or Christianity is, than what Islam or Christianity is for the people at any specific place and time.
[Razib Khan at ]Science has nothing to do with common sense. I believe it was Einstein who said that common sense is a set of prejudices we form by the age of 18. Inject somebody with some viruses and that’s going to keep you from getting sick? That’s not common sense. We evolved from single-cell organisms? That’s not common sense. By driving my car I’m going to cook Earth? None of this is common sense. The common sense view is what we’re fighting against. So somehow you’ve got to move people away from that with these quite complicated scientific arguments based on even more complicated research. That’s why it’s such an uphill battle. People start off with a belief and a prejudice–we all do. And the job of science is to set that aside to get to the truth.
[Simon Singh in an interview with Wired at http://www.wired.com/magazine/2010/08/mf_qa_singh/]Q: How can you tell if it’s been raining cats and dogs?
A: You step in a poodle!
[Misty at Flickr at http://www.flickr.com/photos/misty69/4969353334/]
Capital Cures
Browsing Shakespeare’s London on 5 Groats a Day by Richard Tames the other day I came across the following remedies.
Loss of hair. Try doves’ dung, burnt, failing that the ashes of a small frog
Nits in the hair. Comb with mercury ointment and pig fat
Yep that should see off the nits, if it doesn’t see you off firstHead colds. A sliver of turnip in the nostril
Tinnitus. Oil of hempseed in the afflicted ear, followed by hopping on that side
Retention of urine. Three large lice inserted in the penis
Hmm, I can imagine that might work too; not sure I fancy the side effects thoughAsthma. The lungs of a fox washed in wine, herb and liquorice
OMGTuberculosis. Incurable, but for relief try asses’ milk and snails in their shells
I think on balance I’m glad I live in the 21st century!
Quotes of the Week
Not much by way of amusing or thought provoking quotes this week as we’ve been away, but here are what has passed by me…
What we’re suggesting is that something that doesn’t really interact with anything is changing something that can’t be changed.
[Dr Jere Jenkins quoted on Discover Blogs, 80Beats in trying to explain the theory that neutrinos are affecting radioactive decay half-lives]Yet more proof I could not possibly handle even the most glorious of small children … unless they came with pause and mute buttons.
[Comment at Whoopee]Our ham is formed from cured RSPCA Freedom Food assured pork leg
[Tea shop menu, Rye]
WTF is an “assured pork leg” and how do you cure an RSPCA?
Hut, Rye Harbour
We’re just back from spending a week in Rye, East Sussex with a friend and her three children. The children were a delight: great fun and very amusing if a bit noisy at times. Everyone seems to have had a good time. Amongst other things we got in: the late Derek Jarman’s cottage at Dungeness; several Romney Marsh churches; Romney, Hythe & Dymchurch Railway; some bookshops; a couple of trips to the beach; as well as lots of Rye itself and too little sleep because we sat up talking until late. We could easily have stayed another two weeks and still not run out of interesting things to do. Many thanks to Katy, Tilly, Tallulah and Oscar!
More photos on Flickr as I get time to do post-processing.
Erotic Operandus
For various reasons, I’ve recently been thinking a lot about my belief in how we should approach our erotic lives and our erotic selves. The following is how I think our erotic credo/philosophy should work.
- Ownership. No-one – yes, no-one: parent, friend, guru, god – has the right to tell you what your sexuality should be. It is yours and yours alone to share with others or not as you choose (although, of course, the law decrees there are things which must remain at best forever in the realms of fantasy).
- Fear. Don’t be afraid of your sexuality, what other people might think of it, or anything to do with sex. Your sexuality is yours and for you; no-one else. This is all part of liking yourself. If you can’t accept your own sexuality how can you meaningfully engage with someone else’s?
- Answers. There are no universal right or wrong answers. Your erotic is someone else’s pornographic and yet another person’s tedium. There is only what is better or worse for you.
- Communication. Be prepared to talk about your sexuality, anywhere and to anyone – make it a normal part of your life. That doesn’t mean you should flaunt or proselytise your sexuality; just be open and honest about it when appropriate.
- Appreciation. Learn to accept a compliment and appreciate the simplest erotic gesture.
- Nudity. Nudity is a normal part of life; there’s nothing dirty or unnatural about any part of our bodies and bodily functions. Indeed nudity is good for you; even Benjamin Franklin took regular “air baths”. Or to quote my wife’s god-father, “If you see anything God didn’t make, heave a brick at it”.
- Fantasies. We all have fantasies, we all have wet dreams, we all masturbate. Brilliant!
- Masturbation. Masturbation is normal, enjoyable and good for you! Almost everyone does it throughout their life. Where’s the problem?
- Orgasm. Each of us is responsible for our own orgasms.
- Sticky Bits. Don’t be afraid of genitals and bodily fluids. They are the stuff of life. Without them we’d none of us be here. Embrace them; make them yours.
- Sexual Excitement. By all means take another person’s sexual excitement as a compliment. There’s nothing wrong or threatening about an erection in and of itself, just as there’s nothing wrong or threatening about an aroused yoni (it just ain’t so obvious). The erection/arousal makes no demands and requires no attention, although the person attached to it may want some attention. Your erection/arousal is your own responsibility and no one else’s.
- Responsibility. Only you know what’s right for you and you must take responsibility for getting it. Ask for what you want of yourself or of your partner. Not to do so is denying part of your sexuality. Don’t be afraid; most partners love to be asked!
- Cherish. Your sexuality is what you make of it. Cherish it. Make it good and make it yours. Enjoy!