Ten Things

This month’s Ten Things brings something completely different …
For many years I have noted many imaginary — totally fictional — names of virtual people as they have happened across my brain. As I am now unlikely to every write a sci-fi or fantasy novel (or indeed any fiction) I bring you a selection for your amusement.

10 Imaginary people:

  1. Merkin Hick; American backwoodsman
  2. Armin Plaastar; Dutch; ski instructor
  3. Geisha Bottle (actually more likely Gaysha); East-End 6-year-old; sister of Chardonnay-Madonna Bottle
  4. Ii Ng; Japanese; fashion designer
  5. Mugg O’Teaghe; Irish; builder
  6. Sir Chiltern Waternut; retired ambassador
  7. Willie P Gentleigh; private detective
  8. Constant Lambing; farmer
  9. Mangoe Stikky; rapper
  10. Leena Stagarova; Soviet gymnast

GOK what this says about the state of my brain!

Brexit on, and on, and on …

Another article I picked up yesterday was UK and the EU (10) — What if it is Brexit? on the Law and Lawyers blog. As you might divine it is number 10 in a series which tries to shine some interesting lights on the legal ramifications of the upcoming referendum.
Yesterday’s article points out (without saying it in as many words) that a LEAVE vote on 23 June would present an interesting constitutional crisis. In summary:

  • The present House of Commons has more MPs in favour of remaining in the EU than leaving it.
  • Constitutionally sovereignty rests with Parliament so the referendum result cannot be legally binding on Parliament.
  • But politically it would be very difficult for the government to ignore the referendum result.
  • What the referendum does not address is what would be the UK’s relationship with the EU when the UK leaves at the end of the (presumably 2 year) exit negotiations.
  • Ultimately, Parliament will have to legislate for whatever arrangement is negotiated. That legislative process is likely to be very complex and lengthy with the final legislation depending on the negotiated exit deal. And of course parliament may decline to pass the required legislation.
  • This could be even messier if there is a REMAIN majority in Scotland but not in England. That could re-fuel demands for Scotland independence.
  • The Prime Minister and most ministers have campaigned for REMAIN so how would they stand if the vote is for Brexit? Since the Fixed-term Parliaments Act 2011 it is not possible for the Prime Minister to simply ask the Queen to dissolve Parliament. The next election will be in May 2020 unless a general election is called through one of the two procedures set out in the 2011 Act. There is no other mechanism unless parliament itself repeals (or amends) the 2011 Act.

Interesting times we live in!

Zombie Trains

There was a very illuminating article by Simon Jenkins in yesterday’s Guardian under the banner

HS2: the zombie train that refuses to die


In it Jenkins writes the biography of the HS2 rail project — and how over the years it has been fiddled and fudged by governments and interested parties when there is basically no business case, or any other justification, for it.
Whether you agree with Jenkins or not, it doesn’t make very edifying reading.
My view has always been that HS2 is another classic example, like London’s proposed Garden Bridge, of an unjustified vanity project which has got completely out of hand and sucked in politicians who can’t now be seen to back down. Heathrow’s Third Runway isn’t too far behind either. These mega projects are seldom more than politicians “willy waving”.
They’re all projects which need to be killed off — FAST!
If we’ve got that amount of money to waste spend then it would be better spent on more useful infrastructure projects. Let’s start with a couple of nuclear power stations to reduce our dependence on imported coal and dirty oil with a reduction in CO2 emissions.
I despair of politicians, I really do. Doomed! We’re all doomed!

Oddity of the Week: Flowery X-Rays

We are so often attracted to flowers by their stunning and vibrant colours — a lemon yellow daffodil or a deep red rose. But back in the early 20th century a radiologist, Dr Dain Tasker, was interested in the anatomy of flowers using his professional skills and X-ray film to highlight the soft layering of petals and leaves. This produced ghostly, monochrome images looking more like pen & ink drawings than photographs.


Fuchsia, 1938, vintage gelatin silver print, 24x18cm

There is more information and more images on Colossal and Hyperallergic.

Despair, or not?

I’m beginning to get despondent — no, let’s have this right, I’m now getting ever more deeply despondent — about the EU Referendum on 23 June.
I’m worried that the great British public will vote to LEAVE the EU. They certainly will if the current opinion polls are anything to go by as most seem to be showing LEAVE several points ahead with relatively few undecided voters. Typically the polls I’ve seen in the last week seem to be showing roughly REMAIN on 42% and LEAVE on 44%.
What deepened my worries is the state of mind of the “unthinking masses”. There’s a group on Facebook for the town where I grew up — a town now predominantly populated by people I can only best describe as “Essex chavs” (although that does do an injustice to many). Someone bravely put a poll on the Facebook group asking what people would vote. When I looked a few minutes ago the figures were REMAIN 28, LEAVE 158.
WHAT! Yes, that’s right, almost 6:1 in favour of LEAVE. I find that really scary because it implies that the LEAVE campaign’s fear-mongering, mostly on immigration, has got through to the minds of the less critical masses.
I fear that Joe Public is going to vote according to his tribal and xenophobic, Daily Mail, mindset — just as in many other things he (and she) will always vote with their wallet. Even many immigrants, and children of immigrants, are saying they’ll vote LEAVE because of immigration.
Now don’t get me wrong. I’m OK with a LEAVE vote as long as it is based on some concrete foundations. However I know that Joe Public doesn’t work that way; he votes according to his fears and predilections, not because of good logic. Remember the old research which says that 5% of people can think and do; 5% of people cannot think; the other 90% can thing but just can’t be bothered — and that is partly because they have never been properly taught to do so.
It is going to take an awful lot of thinking citizens to overcome odds like that.
Part of the problem is that people cannot grasp that this whole thing is a big gamble; but a gamble where no-one knows what any of the odds are! This was summed up a couple of days ago by Martin Lewis of moneysavingexpert.com under the title How to vote in the EU referendum. His article is quite nicely balanced; Lewis points out the good and the bad with the EU. Here are a few key snippets:

It’s the biggest consumer decision any of us will ever make. It affects our economy, foreign policy, immigration policy, security and sovereignty. Our vote on whether the UK should leave the EU will reverberate through our lifetimes, and those of our children and grandchildren.
… … …
My mailbag’s been drowning with questions and concerns. The biggest being: “Please just tell us the facts, what’ll happen if we leave?” I’m sorry, but the most important thing to understand is: there are no facts about what happens next.
Anyone who tells you they KNOW what’ll happen if we leave the EU is a liar. Predicting exact numbers for economic, immigration or house price change is nonsense. What’s proposed is unprecedented. All the studies, models and hypotheses are based on assumptions — that’s guesstimate and hope.

Oh, and that applies equally to both sides of the debate! There are no facts; just guesses.
Lewis goes on to recommend that we “do some reading on useful independent sites that run through the issues” and suggests we start with The UK in a Changing Europe which is run by King’s College, London and pools balanced articles from all sides.
He then, quite rightly, points out …

… for most people this comes down to a risk assessment.
A vote for Brexit is unquestionably economically riskier than a vote to remain. Yet don’t automatically read risk as a bad thing. It simply means there’s more uncertainty …
Leaving the EU risks us being left on the sidelines …
Or we could in the long run become a nimble low-tax, low-regulation, tiger economy …
The likely truth is of course somewhere between the two. But most independent analysis suggests Brexit will be detrimental to the economy.
… … …
The volume of uncertainty means the only way to make the right decision is based on your political attitude to the EU, your gut instinct, and how risk-averse you are on each area that matters to you.

All I would say is please do this consciously, after carefully weighing the options, and don’t necessarily go just with your gut feelings (important though they are). In the words of Frank Zappa “a mind is like a parachute — it doesn’t work if it is not open“.
I happen to think that on balance leaving the EU would be the worse option — and heaven knows there’s so much about the EU I don’t like. But I could be wrong. We all could be wrong. As with all things there is no “RIGHT” answer.
And remember, again as Lewis comments, “the future is always a journey” but the path is crazy paving and you lay it yourself as you go along.
Good luck! We’re all going to need it whichever path we take.

Weekly Photograph

Pussy porn again this week …
Meet the latest two additions to the household: The Tuxedo Twins.
Born: 6 April 2016
Arrived here: 3 June 2016
Mother was rescued, very pregnant, and cared for by our local animal rescue group, Guardian Angels Animal Support. These two were our choice from the five kittens. Needless to say our existing cat, Tilly, is not impressed. Well not yet anyway!

Tuxedo Twins (Primrose and Wizard) Enjoying a Lie-in and a Radiator
Tuxedo Twins (Primrose and Wizard) Enjoy a Lie-in and a Radiator
Greenford; June 2016
Wizard (Tuxedo Boy) Practices his Ninja Moves
Wizard (Tuxedo Boy) Practices his Ninja Moves
Greenford; June 2016
Primrose (Tuxedo Girl) Attacks the String
Primrose (Tuxedo Girl) Attacks the String
Greenford; June 2016
Click the images for larger views on Flickr

Word: Apricate

Apricate
1. To sunbathe or bask in the sun
2. To expose to sunlight
ApricateThe word is derived from the Latin aprīcāt- (participial stem of aprīcāri) “to bask in the sun”.
According to the OED the first use was probably in 1691, and John Aubrey is recorded as the second user in 1697. The word has however remained rare.
What is perhaps surprising is that the fruit apricot is not derived from this root but (the OED says) from Greek via Spanish Arabic.

Five Questions, Series 8 #2

And so we come to answering question two of my latest round of Five Questions.

★★☆☆☆

Question 2: Give me an unpopular opinion you have
Oh, my word! There are so many of these. Here have a selection …

  1. Sex work of all kinds should be decriminalised – indeed encouraged.
  2. Every leisure centre and swimming pool (whether publicly or privately run) should be required to hold at least three one-hour mixed-sex nude sessions each week between 8am and 8pm with one of them on a weekday between 9am and 5pm and one at a weekend.
  3. All toilets should be omnisex. And all changing rooms should also be omnisex and without cubicles.
  4. All sports teams should be mixed-sex. (If the armed forces can do mixed sex frontline troops, why can’t sports teams?)
  5. The private motor car should be banned.

Well, no-one said you had to like them or that they had to be practical.

Your Interesting Links

Slightly later than planned, and hence slightly longer than usual, here is my monthly list of articles you might have missed before …
Science & Medicine
Kazakhstan is a treasure trove of naturally wild and flavourful apple varieties.
Welcome the tiny ingestible origami robot which can be used for repairing wounds.


Ocean scientists have been using message in a bottle techniques for over 100 years, and they still are.
One mouse, two mouse, three mouse … Can cats count mice?
And still on felines … can a cat have an existential crisis? Spoiler: yes. [Long read]
Ear wax is very strange and mysterious stuff. [Long read]
Sexuality
OK, girls, so does the ‘G-Spot’ actually exist?
Do humans actually send out airborne aphrodisiac pheromones to attract potential mates? Erm … dunno.
Social Sciences & Business
On the social and design engineering of high heels. [Long read]
How many friends do you have? Are they really your friends?
Alain de Botton on why you will marry the wrong person. And there’s not much you can do about it!
Language
What’s it like learning to talk all over again? Learning Chinese as an adult.
Art & Literature
From mega-libraries down to nano-libraries … here’s the story of London’s smallest library.

Wow! The whole of Samuel Pepys’ Diary is now online.
History
It seems that Ice Age Europe wasn’t populated by who we thought.
The Fitzwilliam Museum in Cambridge have discovered that one of their Ancient Egyptian coffins holds them youngest known mummified foetus.
Ancient toilets can tell us a lot about the lifestyle of their users, and it seems the flush toilet goes further back than we thought. [Long read]
The colour of monastic habits was much more fraught with controversy than one might suspect.
A plague on all your houses. New research suggests that the Black Death was even more devastating than we thought.
Ianvisits reviews the exhibition of the lost library of the Tudor magician John Dee.
Slowly coming more up to date, here’s a look at the background and organisation of the Gunpowder Plot.
An unsuspected mass grave in Durham is though to hold the remains of prisoners from the Battle of Dunbar.
Investigations into a 1661 document awarding £20 to Major Smith.
Lady Antonia Fraser on the sexy and scandalous truth about Versailles and the new BBC series about the same.
How old is that London house? Is it Georgian Or Victorian?

London was devastated during World War 2. The recently published LCC bomb damage maps reveal all. It’s a magnificent volume!
There have been lots of weird and wonderful proposals for building in London which have come to naught. Here are some, arranged by Underground station.
Food & Drink
How to tell real Parmigiano Reggiano from imposters. Science now has a way.
People
So here are two pieces about the forensic mysteries of identifying unknown bodies.
First the mystery of Saddleworth Moor: who was the man they’ve nicknamed Neil Dovestone?
And in the US, just as here in the UK, the identification of nameless bodies can take years before the mysteries are solved.
Shock, Horror, Humour
So here’s a little quiz to end with … What is London’s longest tunnel? It’s OK, I got it wrong too.
More next month.