Category Archives: amusements

Auction Amusements

It’s a long time since we had any amusements from our local auction house. There have been fewer auctions and the pickings have been rather thin for the last year. But here is what I’ve collected – as always it is the strange things people sell and the odd combinations that make up a lot. (Images where they seem to add something. Text & images direct from the auction catalogues.)


Enamelled items, comprising: a pair of Korean enamelled duck sauceboats with covers and spoons on a stand, brightly coloured, and a small octagonal canister, all stamped 98%; an Indian condiment stamped 925; and a Soviet Russian part egg stamped 925



A Georg Jensen silver pendant comprising three abstract triangles, design 138 by Ibe Dahlquist, marked and stamped 925 S Denmark, with associated chain.



A box of military badges presented on cards, a Harrow School bronze medallion, a small quantity of omnibus tickets, a motor car ration book, and an interesting solicitor’s letter dated 1898 and, on behalf of a client, offering an owner £1,450 for the 11 houses numbers 40-60 Avenue Street, Fulham



A saucy Naples figurine of figures at a waterfall.


A mixed lot including a silver plated photograph frame, a pair of silver plated salad servers, art deco style figurines, a vintage oil can, a Chanel book, a Radley’s ladies handbag, a silver and amber brooch, a Russian Zorki-6 cased camera, a small quantity of motor magazines etc.



A fine old Mobile Oil Pump early 20th century of tapering ovoid form.



A Simplex No. 6 Coffee Grinder with two large wheels painted red with a silver-coloured funnel.


A table of architectural items, including a large quantity of metalwork, knobs, furniture handles, a workshop lamp, five old locks, a pair of 19th century carriage lamps in brass and metal, a Georgian oak wall-mounted cutlery and candle box, another oak box, a fine Victorian set of clothes pegs with porcelain knobs on a mahogany back, an old oil can, a tea canister-style table lamp and others, and a Follows & Bate Ltd, New Universale Marmalade Machine from Manchester, with table bracket, etc.


A table and … a quantity of curiosities, including pottery, metalwares, cutlery, tools, teddy bears, old cameras, early 20th century photograph albums, handbags, Victorian boxes, a Supersonic hi-fi, a folder of early 20th century love letters, CDs, a Chinon projector, telephones, old Quink ink bottles, jewel boxes, etc.


An extensive lot, including a four-piece Teac hi-fi with a JVC amp, a Toshiba amp, a pair of JVC speaker, a Toshiba portable computer, two HP printers, a filing box of CDs, a quantity of china, an iron, a shredder, Sennheiser earphones, model cats, old telephones, etc., and three suitcases on wheels



A large pair of decorative floor-standing metal vases decorated with sunflowers and birds



A late 19th century Swiss Black Forest wooden musical coat hook, carved as an anthropomorphic dog with glass eyes, and with gun and powder flask bearing the Swiss cross, with chamois horn feet, fitted with a musical movement with 6 cm cylinder numbered 12 223, with applied circular metal label inscribed ‘C. Spiess Schloss Laufen Patent 16870’ and remains of paper label, 39 cm high


A large quantity of astrological [sic] accessories and spares across three and a half shelves including lenses by Meade and Parks plus others, many labelled with sizes and magnification, a monochrome camera by Starlight Xpress Mx716, a large mirrored refractor, possibly the base for a telescope, two Celestron Star Diagonal 1’s, a Cullmann clamp, a Revelation 2 in dielectric mirror diagonal, a Meade Plossl 5 element 9 mm, a Sirius Plossl 25 mm lens, an AC power supply unit No.110 etc., a large quantity for the keen amateur or professional (telescopes have not been checked for their completeness)


A Cuisinart 1.5L ice cream maker and a small quantity of Folio Society books



A carved wooden owl garden seat



A rare pair of early 20th century decorator’s easels, and a smaller single easel



A four-fold hardwood screen, each leaf with a panel of six glass panes above upholstered lower section covered in floral fabric, and an early 20th century folding wooden stepladder of seven steps



Four old wooden folding garden chairs and an old set of wooden step-ladders.



Eleven vintage bike lights including ‘Lucas Silver king, Birmingham’


A mixed lot comprising an oak Art Nouveau smoker’s companion, a quantity of brassware including goblets, candlesticks and vases, a vintage pencil sharpener, electrical testing equipment, a small quantity of records, flatware etc.



Electronic projector, a Rollei Projector P350A, a metal handle, a cased General Electric Company electrical implement, a large metal microscope on wooden base, two Victorian children’s nightdresses, an oval mirror etc.


A bag of golf clubs including John Letters and Daiwa, plus a Tryglider Gold Trolley, a McLaren foldable pushchair, garden seats in bags and a pair of Speedo flippers.


A nautical lot comprising a bronze porthole frame, a bronze pump, a large metal anchor and ropes.


A Dyson hot and cool fan, a Cuprinol fence sprayer, a Karcher K2 compact pressure washer, a folding music stand, an empty guitar case, a gold coloured adjustable reading light, two large silver Trider exercise balls and a collapsible circular garden table.


A musical instrument lot comprising a mandolin by G. Grandini, a mandolin in case, a violin with label inside, possibly Mapp, a Zither and a lacrosse racket.


A mixed lot including a pair of brass shell cases, a pair of Brevette French bike pedals, a small box of coins, a metal Tilley lamp, flat iron, a small collection of men’s magazines, a set of three large metal frying pans, a large flower holder, a quantity of frames, old metal cooking pots and a quantity of vintage tools including hammers, etc.


A large wooden church candlestick, two verdigris candlesticks, three lightshades and a quantity of glassware mainly wineglasses, tumblers, sherry glasses, etc., one golf club, three books on London, etc.


A quantity of long farming implements and walking sticks.


Two boxes of mid-20th century mainly children’s books including Richmal Crompton, a microscope, ephemera, puzzles, and a small collection of antique lace nightdresses, undergarments, wedding accessories, etc.


The Village. VIII.

The Village – A Story in Eight Pieces

VIII. King George’s Oak

Abundant the Acorns, cached by the Jay,
While well furrowed Bark keeps fungus at bay.

Cork’s from an oak, it’s preserving our wine,
The Dove’s in her nest, a love bird divine.

Look there’s our Ellen, snuggling her swain,
Ripe for the Fuck, that they’ll soon entertain.

Old Billy Goat’s browsing anything low,
Turning Herbs to manure, and helping things grow.

Ever green is the Ivy, hiding a drey,
While the old Jay’s still caching away.

Katt is the cat who’s stalking the Jay,
While thousands of Larvae are munching all day.

Growing the Moths which make food for the Bat,
And leaving the Nuts which make Squirrel all fat.

Over the Orchard, grow apples to munch,
By agéd Piers Ploughman, who’s eating his lunch.

Pretty’s the Quince, with pink flowers in Spring,
While later a Robin Christmas greetings will bring.

Slyly the Stoat’s on the lookout for prey,
While circles of Toadstools, grow in the hay.

Shady the Umbra, we all sit beneath,
Not knowing the Vixen’s her den underneath.

Wispy the Wool, from the sheep of the croft,
While woody old Xylem, sends water aloft.

Here there’s a Yew, that great tree of old,
Protecting our Zzzzleeps, more precious than gold.

Well I hope you’ve enjoyed this little drollery. Watch this space in case there are further developments.

The Village. VII.

The Village – A Story in Eight Pieces

VII. More Village People

First there is Alice, whose surname is King,
her husband is Bert, who can mend any thing.

Clive is the one who tends to our hair,
He’s living with Dana, exceedingly fair.

Starchy is Ellie, she’s really a prude,
While Fanny relaxes, sunbathing nude.

Gary and Greg live as husband and wife,
And then there is Hannah, the vicar’s young wife.

There’s Arthur’s girl, Izzy, living alone,
With twins Jane and Jemima, father unknown.

Here is Nurse Karen, who tends to our ails,
And lazy old Leslie, who lodges at Gail’s.

We all love Matilda, a Master of Wine,
But no-one likes Norman, a breeder of swine.

There goes Orlena, who lives by her snatch,
While Pete the Policeman watches our patch.

Quaintly old Queenie lives down The Streete,
And Robin the farmer, grows barley and wheat.

Susy the sculptor carves objects in wood,
Her Toby’s a terror, mostly up to no good.

Doctor Umberto’s an expert on soils,
He lives next to Vikki, a painter in oils.

Old Walter’s a wonder, he’s still mending clocks,
Next to Miss Xandra, a stitcher of frocks.

Yanko is ancient – he came in the war,
and lastly there’s Zoe, our expert on law.

Piece VIII will appear on Tuesday 18 May.

Ten Things: May

This year our Ten Things series – which surprisingly appears on the tenth of each month – continues concentrating on the amusing, both real and fictional. So this month we have …

Ten Oddly Named Animals

  1. Alston’s Singing Mouse
  2. Annamite Striped Rabbit
  3. Jackson’s Climbing Salamander
  4. Malabar Whistling Thrush
  5. Penis Snake
  6. West Indian Whistling Duck (right)
  7. Zigzag Elm Sawfly
  8. Screaming Hairy Armadillo
  9. Raspberry Crazy Ant
  10. Striped Pyjama Squid

The Village. VI.

The Village – A Story in Eight Pieces

VI. The Duck Pond

Andy the Angler, is trying his luck,
While bumble-y Bees, at the flowers they suck.

Cunning the Carp – a fish cannot drown,
Unlike the Ducks, all dabbling down.

There is Old Eb, who sits on the bench,
He’s watching the Fox, just seen jumping the fence.

There’s gaggles of Geese, they’re just flying sheep,
And then there’s old Heron, who’s off with a leap.

Winter brings Ice – see the skating is free,
Surprising the Jogger who stops for a pee.

Look! – a Kingfisher – just flashes of blue,
Zips past the Log we use as a pew.

Merry the Mermaid, we never have seen,
But here is a Newt – this one’s called Jean!

O are the ripples caused by a rock,
Thrown by the Parson, ignoring his flock.

A Quern Stone has made a step at the edge
Of the tall Rushes right next to the hedge.

A babbling Stream, with its water so clean,
Houses the Toad, all swarthy and green.

Running, the Urchin’s evading his Mum,
Ignoring a Vandal, fly-tipping – the scum!

Wet was the Witch they once ducked in the pond,
But saucy young Xena swims the millpond.

Yo, there’s a Yob, forever a pest,
To even the Zephyr which blows from the west.

Piece VII will appear on Tuesday 11 May.

Things to Think About: May

This year we’re beginning each month with a (potentially logical) oddity to think about, and to keep the brain cells active. This month:

If you replace “W” with “T” in “What”, “Where”, “When”, you get the answer to each of them.

Please leave your thoughts in the comments.

Monthly Links

It’s again time for our monthly round up of links to items you may have missed. And there’s a lot in this month’s offering, so let’s get in …


Science, Technology, Natural World

Matter is complex, but that complexity has given rise to the good and the bad of nuclear physics. [LONG READ}

The secret of a rat’s sense of touch is all to do with the whiskers.

It seems a surprising number of sea monster sightings are actually whale boners.


Health, Medicine

A new understanding of how our ancient immune system works could help fight future pandemics. [£££]

On the strange cases of healthy children who won’t wake up.

Why are so many women ill-prepared for perimenopause? And how they needn’t be. [LONG READ]


Sexuality

As a special treat this month we have a collection of articles on medieval sex (and how it relates to our modern ideas) from our favourite medieval historian, Dr Eleanor Janega of Going Medieval

On dildos and penance

On women having sex with themselves

Back in the day cuckolding wasn’t just a thing, it was a thing thast was bound to happen (for the rich, at least). [LONG READ]

On sexualising the “other”, ie. anything except cis white men!

On the medieval acceptance of sex work and the fallacy of “rescuing” sex workers.


Environment

The cherry blossom in Kyoto is earlier this year than ever previously recorded, and the trend over the last 100 years is for earlier and earlier dates.

Without the asteroid which wiped out the dinosaurs, we likely wouldn’t have the Amazon rainforest.


History, Archaeology, Anthropology

A slab of rock, engraved in the Bronze Age, is thought to be the oldest 3D map in Europe.

On the Ancient Egyptians and belief in the after-life.

Archaeologists have uncovered an important Roman site in Scarborough.

We’re going back to Going Medieval for the next two items …

On canonical hours, comfort, and daylight saving time.

On the commemoration of royal death.

Medlars were popular fruit in medieval times, but have fallen out of fashion.

John Spilsbury, the engraver behind the first jigsaw puzzle, a “dissected” map, died on 3 April 1769.

Anti-Vaxxers are nothing new: they’ve been around since Edward Jenner invented the first smallpox vaccine.

Dhaka muslin is an ancient Indian fabric which no-one knows how to make, but which a few weavers are trying to resurrect. [LONG READ]


London

The short stretch of the Hertford Union Canal in east London has been drained for repairs and is giving up its secrets.

When is a river actually a canal? When it’s the New River.


Lifestyle, Personal Development, Beliefs

Nudity at home has become much more common during lockdown, so can naturism become the new trend?

Lockdown has changed quite a few women’s views on bras – both for and against what seems to this mere male to be nothing but a garment of torture.

Going Medieval (yes, again!) considers Jezebel, makeup, and other apocalyptic signs.

How to declutter your home as lockdown eases. Hint: you’ll need the biggest cardboard box you can find.

How the pandemic changed our hygiene habits: we bathe less, but are no more smelly.


Shock, Horror, Humour, Wow!

The mystery of the man who fell from the sky. [LONG READ]

And finally, it seems that big boat that got stuck in the Suez Canal is partly to blame for the UK’s shortage of garden gnomes.


The Village. V.

The Village – A Story in Eight Pieces

V. The Sun Inn

Amber’s the Ale, the brewery’s best,
Poured by the Barmaid, a magnificent chest.

The Cider’s refreshing; the girls drink in sips;
While Tom’s Dog goes begging for peanuts and chips.

‘Ere is young Emma who always wears clogs,
And sits by the Fire, made up with good logs.

All the fine Glass is so sparkling and clear,
And still we’ve the Hat, which was left here last year.

Ice is in cubes – no, not in my beer!
There’s a jang-e-ly jukebox we wish wasn’t here.

Cute is yon Katy whose hair is dyed pink,
Thus deceiving the Lager that only poofs drink.

There’s food on the Menu, good pies do abound,
While Nuts is the cat who’s always around.

There is Old Arthur, still sucking his pipe,
And Polly, Stan’s Parrot, who’s language is ripe.

Lend me a Quid, I need five for a beer,
And top up Miss Rosie, who’s everyone’s dear.

The Snug at the back’s where the old ‘uns hold court,
Draining the Tankards which each of them brought.

There’s yeuchy Urinals where water we pass,
After drinking the Vino, that’s sold by the glass.

Wee is the Widow, still hearty and hale,
Sipping her 5X, a lovely strong ale.

The Young and the Yoof, so noisy and loud,
Still treasure Zog, our mascot, so proud.

Piece VI will appear on Tuesday 4 May.

The Village. IV.

The Village – A Story in Eight Pieces

IV. The Village Stores

A-2-Z Stores serves every and each,
Selling Bananas and Butter and Bleach.

Cheese just so special; Charcoal for the grill;
Detergent’s essential; Daffs for the thrill.

Ed sells no cake, nor bread, meat or fish
Frozen excepted, and Fruit for the dish.

The Fruit Gums are tasty; the kiddies they please,
And so is the Honey, from Freddie’s good bees.

There’s flavoursome Ice Cream, local and good,
With extra pink Jelly for trifle or pud.

The Kale it is rough, only good for the sheep;
Loo paper’s essential, and Ed sells it cheap.

There’s Milk and there’s Mops and even some Macs,
While the Nails and the Screws are in little packs.

There’s Olives and Oils, mostly pressed out of seeds,
And the little Post Office will serve all your needs.

There’s seldom a Queue, it never tops four,
There’s Rice as a staple for puddings and more.

Sandpaper, Sugar, and Seeds for our patch,
Plus trays of the Toffee Jill makes by the batch.

Greasy an Unction for toenails ingrown,
And varietal Veggies, most locally grown.

You need a new permit to fish by the Weir,
And Xmas is coming, no glitter this year.

Live are the Yoghurt, and Yeast, but more yet,
Zee are the last things we mustn’t forget.

Piece V will appear on Monday 26 April.