Category Archives: amusements

amusements, current affairs, quotes, thoughts

Quotes of the Week

I’m beginning to think that quotations found are like London buses: they come in threes; last week there was a dearth of good quotes; this week we have a glut. Here are the best of this week’s crop.

Take chances, make mistakes. That’s how you grow. Pain nourishes your courage. You have to fail in order to practice being brave.
[Mary Tyler Moore]

Chance favours the prepared mind.
[Louis Pasteur]

I wish someone had explained those two to me when I was young. Equally the following, told me by my barber hairdresser also explains a lot.

My brain is going. It’s not my age; it’s my thinning hair. Where the hair falls out the vacant pores let in water, so when my head gets wet the water mixes with the electricity in the brain. Not good!
[Clive Dodd]

Mind you it would be good if more people understood the next …

What people should expect is 100% energy and 100% effort. What no government can guarantee is 100% success.
[Dr John (Lord) Reid; former Labour Cabinet Minister]

But then we could do with a lot of politicians understanding these next three …

The first thing we do, let’s kill all the lawyers.
[Shakespeare; Henry VI Part 2, IV:ii]

The most dangerous strategy is to jump a chasm in two leaps.
[Benjamin Disraeli]

Man, unlike animals, has never learned that the sole purpose in life is to enjoy it.
[Samuel Butler]

amusements, personal, sexuality, thoughts

Pearl Necklace

Artist Leah Piepgras has created that essential piece of jewellery to wear to your next job interview.

As Peipgras says on her website:

Pearl Necklace is a seemingly amorphous cast silver shape on a chain that is actually an accurate representation of semen. It is a visual marker of chaos turned perfection through an act of beauty and lust. Pearl Necklace is a physical reminder of a fleeting moment of pleasure.

Even assuming you would pay $420 for the privilege, how many would have the courage to wear this to work let alone to a job interview? (Not that it to my mind hugely obvious what it represents.) I certainly wouldn’t, but then I’m not into girlie jewellery – and I’ve never seen any equivalent to us chaps. What about it someone?

amusements, beliefs, environment, food+drink, quotes, thoughts

Food for Thought

I came across the following a few days ago. I had to think hard to grasp exactly what was being said, but having done so I think the message is powerful. It relates to false life, as propounded on my Zen Mischief website. Sentimentality is a manifestation of false life, through false emotions. True sentiment (“what one feels with regard to something; mental attitude; an opinion or view as to what is right or agreeable; a mental feeling, an emotion; those feelings which involve an intellectual element or are concerned with ideal objects” – OED) is part of a considered reaction to and engagement with real life in the raw. There is a rather large difference …

Sentimentality creates the CAFO [Concentrated Animal Feeding Operations] farm – the sentimentality that says we are too weak to bear the pain of knowing animals and watching them die. This is what turns our food into Styrofoam packages and allows CAFO agriculture, where animals are carefully hidden from our view, and the relationship of our purchases carefully concealed. Sentimentality allows us to care about the extinction of the preferred charismatic mega-fauna of our choice […] but that we see no connection between our purchases, our acts and the habitat destruction of the animals in question. Sentimentality enables us to care about the child Pakistani-flood victim on nightly TV enough to send some money – but not enough to try and reduce the number of climate-related natural disasters by giving up some of our privileges. Sentimentality enables the patriotic fervour that allows us to not know how many Iraqi or Afghani civilians die in the interest of our national “greater goods.” Sentimentality is the emotion that emerges from the condition of not knowing – and it is what you have left in a society that conceals at every level real knowledge. It too is both cause and effect – it permits great evil, and it facilitates lack of knowledge of the real.

Sentiment – love, anger, attachment, affection – real emotions – these derive from knowledge, and they can’t be faked. And when you know things, the choices you make get more complex. The realities you live in get harder and greyer. Sometimes love means you have to kill something. Sometimes one love means that another loved thing get sacrificed. Sometimes you have to go against your feelings. But the only way that never happens is when you substitute sentimentality for real feeling.

We live in a world where sentimentality poses as real emotion, where we are often actively discouraged from understanding consequences, from developing real love for people and things, and from paying attention. It is easy to miss the distinction between the two entirely – because we have blurred so many things together.

[Sharon Astyk at Casaubon’s Book Weblog]

amusements, books, topographical

From Youth to Paradise

I was reminded today of that lovely GK Chesterton poem The Rolling English Road.

Before the Roman came to Rye or out to Severn strode,
The rolling English drunkard made the rolling English road.
A reeling road, a rolling road, that rambles round the shire,
And after him the parson ran, the sexton and the squire;
A merry road, a mazy road, and such as we did tread
The night we went to Birmingham by way of Beachy Head.

I knew no harm of Bonaparte and plenty of the Squire,
And for to fight the Frenchman I did not much desire;
But I did bash their baggonets because they came arrayed
To straighten out the crooked road an English drunkard made,
Where you and I went down the lane with ale-mugs in our hands,
The night we went to Glastonbury by way of Goodwin Sands.

His sins they were forgiven him; or why do flowers run
Behind him; and the hedges all strengthening in the sun?
The wild thing went from left to right and knew not which was which,
But the wild rose was above him when they found him in the ditch.
God pardon us, nor harden us; we did not see so clear
The night we went to Bannockburn by way of Brighton Pier.

My friends, we will not go again or ape an ancient rage,
Or stretch the folly of our youth to be the shame of age,
But walk with clearer eyes and ears this path that wandereth,
And see undrugged in evening light the decent inn of death;
For there is good news yet to hear and fine things to be seen,
Before we go to Paradise by way of Kensal Green.

What could better summarise the English countryside, the fun of youth and the eventual wisdom of age!

amusements, current affairs, medical, quotes, science, thoughts

Quotes of the Week

A rich vein of quotes this week. Here are some of the best …

A committee is a cul-de-sac down which ideas are lured and then quietly strangled.
[Sir Barnett Cocks]

It is a primitive form of thought that things either exist or do not exist.
[Sir Arthur Eddington]

We [doctors] do things, because other doctors do so and we don’t want to be different, so we do so; or because we were taught so [by teachers, fellows and residents]; or because we were forced [by teachers, administrators, regulators, guideline developers] to do so, and think that we must do so; or because the patient wants so, and we think we should do so; or because of more incentives [unnecessary tests (especially by procedure oriented physicians) and visits], we think we should do so; or because of the fear [by the legal system, audits] we feel that we should do so [so called covering oneself]; or because we need some time [to let nature take its course], so we do so; finally and more commonly, that we have to do something [justification] and we fail to apply common sense, so we do so.
[MS Parmar, “We do things because”, British Medical Journal Rapid Response, 2004, March 1 quoted in Imogen Evans, Hazel Thornton & Iain Chalmers, Testing Treatments: Better Research for Better Healthcare]

A wise man makes his own decisions; an ignorant man follows public opinion.
[Chinese proverb]

I am proud that our country remains the scourge of the oppressed. Freedom is once again on the march, as the good people of America join together to wave it goodbye.
GEORGE W BUSH
[Craig Brown; The Lost Diaries]

Born to American-Indian parents, he spent his formative years in abject poverty in Ireland, nibbling on crusts in a tepee in the exclusive slum area of Limerick. Though there were no books in the family home, he occupied his childhood reading the tepee’s assembly instructions over and over again, and in this way gained an unsurpassed command of the English language, as evidenced by his early Tepee Trilogy: Lay the Fabric Flat (1968), With the Long Side Facing Up (1972) and Now Set the Pole in an Upright Position (1975).
[Craig Brown; dust-jacket of The Lost Diaries]

Maturity is only a short break in adolescence.
[Jules Feiffer]

Marriage isn’t a passion-fest; it’s more like a partnership formed to run a very small, mundane, and often boring non-profit business. And I mean this in a good way.
[Lori Gottlieb]

amusements, food+drink

Cooking by Internet

No, not an original title! And if you read the post called Cooking by Internet from Douglas Adams (yes, he who created Dilbert) I think you’ll see it isn’t quite so daft.

Adams is out to lunch (pun intended) but at the same time he’s often fucking brilliant. This is so daft it is awesome.

As he says “Don’t lie. You’d pay extra for it.”! Hmmm…

amusements, current affairs, memes, people, pleasures

Snailr Postcard

Yay! I’m one of the lucky recipients of a postcard from The Snailr Project, brainchild of Anna over at little.red.boat. The card arrived this morning having taken almost a month to get here from somewhere in Texas.

Anna’s idea was that as she was doing a long (like 2 week) circular train trip round the US she would send random postcards to random volunteers to build up a sort of travelogue – except any one person got only one snapshot. In Anna’s words:

One journey of almost 7000 miles, six new cities, eight trains, fifteen days, and every vignette, observation and fractured bitty-bit of the travelogue broken up and sent as status messages the old way. By postcard. To a bunch of random people who asked for one. Because travelling slowly is nice. And so is leaving a trail to see where we have been.

Anna used a standard postcard, so she could prepare them in advance and not rely on local supplies.  She then customised each card with description, drawing, or whatever along the way and posted them whenever a mailbox hove into sight.

He’s the card Anna sent me from somewhere in Texas, just after they had been involved in a train crash on Friday 10 September!

Snailr Project Card

The caption to the map (which shows Anna’s route in red and the location with a * and snail logo) says

the snailr project isn’t injured. At all. Not even for insurance.

And the main text reads:

After the train had juddered to a sudden halt, and we pulled to a stop with one side half of a big, silver, grain truck (the front half) on one side of the train, the back half on the other, the rush around to find out who, if anyone, was injured, began. What a dreadful sentence. Sorry. Basically, we were ordered back to our seats and eight sets of people – first Amtrak staff, then paramedics, fire fighters, policemen, walked through the train asking if everyone was OK. They said they were. But half an hour later when people started talking to each other about later claims, all manner of injuries started appearing.

You can find Anna’s pictures from the trip with some commentary at snailrproject.com and also on Flickr.

I’m looking forward to the book of the postcards of the journey!

amusements, science

A la recherche du temps perdu

I just must reblog this. Click the image to go to the full version.

It is a brilliant theory of time which complements my theory that time passes at a variable rate. Intuitively we know time passes at a variable rate. Remember how some morning you get up and go through your normal routine only to find you’re 20 minutes late leaving for work? But the next day you do exactly the same and you’re 15 minutes early? See, the passage of time is variable. Worse it is locally variable; ie. varies differently for me and you. Why can scientists not prove this? Because observing something is known to disrupt that which is being observed; the effect only happens if we’re not specifically looking at it.

Well that’s my crackpot theory anyway! 🙂

amusements, medical, science

Ig Noble Awards

This year’s Ig Noble Awards for wacky and improbable science discoveries were announced a few days ago. The awards are always fun and often thought-provoking. Here are this year’s highlights. [As usual my comments in italic.]

Physics: Researchers in New Zealand found that wearing your socks over your shoes improves your ability to walk on ice.
[In what way is this not self-evident?]

Management: A mathematical study in Italy found that in some business situations, it is better to promote randomly than the choose the most qualified candidates.
[And you thought the corporate world worked on the basis of who was prepared to sleep with whom.]

Engineering: A team from the UK and Mexico found the perfect way to collect whale snot: despatch petri-dishes attached underneath a remote controlled helicopter to hover above the whale when it blows.
[Ingenious, no?]

Public Health: A study of bearded scientists working in microbial labs found that they carry along a hoard of microbes in their facial hair and may literally be taking their work home with them at the end of the day.
[Again how was this not self-evident?]

Chemistry: A team including BP were awarded an Ig Nobel for their studies over the summer of how oil, natural gas, and water interact.
[Yeah, the Gulf of Mexico makes a great summer field trip for the graduate students.]

And finally …

Biology: A UK team discovered that fruit bats engage in oral sex to prolong their sexual encounters.
[And you worried about human sexuality!.]

You can find the complete list here.

amusements, beliefs, current affairs, photography, science, thoughts

Quotes of the Week

1 Comment

Here, in random order, is this week’s rather rich helping of amusing and insightful quotes.

The first two are from Scott Adams, creator of Dilbert; right on the money as always:

A CEO has something called a “vision.” That is a view of the future that is not supported by evidence.
[Scott Adams at The Scott Adams Blog]

The primary function of a CEO is hurting other people, specifically the stockholders and employees of competing companies. He wants to take their market share, their wealth, and their happiness. And a CEO isn’t too affectionate with his vendors and employees either.
[Scott Adams at The Scott Adams Blog]

I can think of many who won’t like the next, but again it is so true:

Morality is doing what is right regardless of what you are told.
Religion is doing what you are told regardless of what is right.
[Found on Tumblr]

And this was from a video clip of an interview with a couple of gays; it cracked me up!

Love at first innuendo.
[Dan Savage]

This one is for Katy …

Eat cake. Change lives.
[Macmillan Cancer Support advertisement]

I couldn’t resist this wonderful critical put-down on a paragraph of absolute scientific mumbo-jumbo:

That paragraph reads like he authors were cobbling together a braille sentence using the random distribution of acne on someone’s back.
[Jesse Bering at www.scientificamerican.com/blog/, 22/09/2010]

If only I’d been told this next many years ago!

The only disability in life is a bad attitude
[Quoted by Kittypinkstars at Flickr]

How the other half live:

Glamour model Katie Price has been found guilty of not being in proper control of her pink horsebox after veering into another lane in Sussex.
[BBC News]

Needless to say it was the very idea of a pink horsebox which got me! And so finally an interesting “off the wall” take which again contains a huge element of truth:

I have heard many times that atheists know more about religion than religious people. Atheism is an effect of that knowledge, not a lack of knowledge. I gave a Bible to my daughter. That’s how you make atheists.
[Dave Silverman, president of American Atheists]

That’s all for this week.