Listography : Arrggghhhh!!!!! Bloody Children!

After a hiatus of a few weeks Kate’s Listography is back and has gone monthly.

This month her theme is the Top 5 Things I Love about Kids.

Bloody kids again! Why does the world have to revolve around children?

Why is it that these days I seem to see nothing but kid-centric, “doting-mummy” blogs and websites? And sycophantic parents/grandparents?

Why is it that the vast majority of people can only identify themselves through their children? Or their grandchildren? To the exclusion of all else.

Noreen and I mostly don’t do children. We chose not to have children because we were neither of us convinced we wanted them. We were agreed that for us parenthood had to be a full time job for one of us until any youngest child was able to reasonably look after itself after school, especially as we didn’t have a raft of nearby family to provide (free) childcare. And we both had careers; in Noreen’s case a career break (25+ years ago) would have ended her career — the career she had always wanted. So we preferred to be here to help our friends and their children when they needed it. It’s a different sort of give-back.

Fine if you want children. But too many people seem to drift into having kids because they’re conditioned to it and can’t think about any alternative. Then when they’ve got them they forget everything else they ever knew and that there’s more to life the kids. Once upon a time there weren’t reliable alternatives to spawning a child every year or two. Now there are alternatives; let’s use them to their fullest potential.

It’s almost as if those of us without children become invisible. We don’t matter to anyone and we almost don’t exist. UK employment law gives special privileges to parents in terms of being allowed time away from work for their family. Those of us without kids get nothing except to cover the parents’ work. Isn’t that discrimination? Bah! Humbug!

Actually it’s worse than because it seems some women are actually vilified and/or bullied because they don’t have children, see here.

Besides not having children is probably the least selfish and most eco-friendly thing any of us can do.

Actually I guess it’s really that I dislike society’s attitude to children and the overarching influence it has on most parents. (Clearly there are exceptions — we spent yesterday evening, very enjoyably, with one of them.)

Having said that, I don’t dislike children as long as they are well behaved (but then that applies to adults too). I do dislike those nasty-yelling-messy-smelly-baby-things and their doting retinues.

So what (if anything) do I like about kids? I can’t make five but …

1. Yes, they can be highly amusing. Mispronunciations. Wacky ideas. Crazy antics.

2. Being able to have an adult conversation with them. In my (limited) experience they are actually quite good at this much younger than we think, as long as one picks words and concepts carefully.

3. Being able to “give them back”. They’re fine for an hour or two, but God, looking after the little buggers all the time would seriously drive me nuts!

Sorry Kate! I’m just being a grumpy old git.

Desert Island Discs

News for those of you who are Anthony Powell aficionados …

At long last the recording of Powell’s 1976 BBC Radio 4 appearance on Desert Island Discs is available on the BBC website.

You can find it at www.bbc.co.uk/radio4/features/desert-island-discs/castaway/20d4d62a.

It is well worth a listen!

Get out of jail free?

Now here’s a fascinating idea to play with …

The UK could be handed a “Get out of jail free” card by the Scots.

A senior Scots constitutional lawyer has suggested that “Scottish independence could see the UK kicked out of the European Union”.

Rejoining would then require a new referendum (which would likely be lost?) and if we did rejoin we’d likely lose our huge EU payments discount.

One can hope that the Scots might do us a favour, but I suspect the EU would fudge things so they didn’t … so we’ll still need an acrobatic display of pig avionics as well.

Heresy Corner has a fuller report on the speculations.

More you may have missed …

A further selection of items recently spotted which you may have missed.

This week it seems to be mostly about sexuality, in the broadest sense. But first a couple of miscellaneous items.

The first is a report of a venomous snake which can kill, but even if it doesn’t it can seriously mess with your hormonal system and (partly) reverse puberty.

For the aficionados of history and things touristy, as well as bookshops, there is now a small bookshop in the Wellington Arch at London’s Hyde Park Corner. The Arch itself is also open and well worth a visit, if only for the views. IanVisits reported recently and I mentioned it a couple of times a few days ago.

And now for all the “sex stuff” …

Wellington Arch

… although the first is also historic. Here’s a report of vulva shaped Medieval pilgrim badges.

In further revelations, researchers claim to have worked out a woman’s ‘sexiest time’. 11pm on Saturday since you ask!

And yet more researchers claim to have shown that, for men, red is not a proxy signal for female genitalia. Think I could have told them that!

Here’s an interesting article on society’s attitudes towards childless women. Why is it that everyone is supposed to have children? Why can’t we accept that some don’t want to, and some can’t. And many who can’t accept that’s the way life is. And then there’s society’s attitude to men who aren’t fathers: we get just as much incomprehension, although not as much cattiness. In my view the childless are legally discriminated against in the workplace with the law requiring that parents have the right to special/extra leave which isn’t available to the childless, who have to mop up the extra work. Besides not having children is possibly the most eco-friendly thing one can do — rapidly followed by not having a car and not flying.

Finally a piece by Kate Takes 5 on book clubs and Brazilians. Why do women (and some men too!) feel the need to remove all their pubic hair? Sure beats me!

Word : Dhobi

Dhobi
A caste group on the Indian Sub-continent who specialise in washing clothes.
Derived from the Hindi dhona, to wash.

Dhobie’s Itch
Ring-worm affecting the arm-pit and groin regions in hot moist climates; also a form of contact dermatitis.

The Gallery : Morning

The Gallery is back! Tara who runs The Gallery has been ill, but I’m glad that she’s now OK and this week it is once more open for business. This week’s theme is Morning, so without more ado, here’s my contribution:

Crows on a Crane

This was taken at the end of our trip to Germany in February 2008 for steam trains on the Harzer Schmalspurbahnen (HSB). HSB consists of the three narrow gauge (1m) railway lines of the Harz region: Harzquerbahn, Selketalbahn and Brockenbahn.

This was taken the morning we left for home; it was about 0720 local time and very cold. While we waited for the train from Wernigerode Hbf at sunrise these crows were having their morning briefing meeting on the crane of the building site next to the station.

There are more photos from the trip on Flickr.

On National Service

The rise of the most vociferous union power really only happened from the 1960s in Britain, seemingly from about the time of Prime Ministers Harold Wilson (1964-70 & 1974-76) and Ted Heath (1970-74).

This was at the time when National Service had been abolished, so the younger members of the workforce had neither been through the war nor had to do National Service. Military service would have attuned people to the taking of orders without question. But this generation didn’t have that. And they saw that there could be something they believed to be better.

Hence the rebellions of the unions against the “officer class” of the working world: encouraged by the Socialist Wilson and the fire fuelled by their dislike of the Conservative Heath. At much the same time the students, being thinkers, could see that the officers’ orders were not going to make progress towards the “something better” of their vision.

Are people more subdued and subservient out in society if they have had to do National Service and are acclimatised to taking orders rather than questioning them?

But, I suggest, it is this rise of union power which has been a large factor in getting the country into its current mess. Against the backdrop of the world economy (certainly also a factor) there has since the mid-60s been this continual running skirmish — and sometimes open warfare — between the workers/unions and the “officers of industry”, with the government sometimes taking one side or the other depending on its political ideology.

There is also an argument that the unions have stifled job flexibility. By (rightly in many cases) protecting their skilled members they may have compartmentalised job roles making it less easy for people to transition from one role to another, and thus reducing flexibility and mobility in the workplace.

Would Britain be in a better position if this warfare had not existed? If we still had National Service? And if everyone was much more attuned to take orders than question them?

I don’t know. What constitutes “better”?

We likely wouldn’t have the freedoms, the greater equalities, and the opportunities we currently do. But then again we might still have manufacturing industry and people trained in manual skills prepared to do lower-level jobs and thus have less need for immigration.

Would we? I don’t know. But it is an interesting speculation.

I would have hated National Service just as I would have hated going to public school or Oxbridge. I’m proud to have had some of the last of the good grammar school education and been given the opportunity to go to university; an opportunity I would not have had 10 years earlier. And I’m grateful for that education which has been a foundation stone of making me the awkward thinker I am, as are many of my contemporaries. In that sense where we are is a good thing; it allowed many of us to develop and break away from the grindstones. Which is why I consider it beholden on me to give back to society what I can by using both my brain and my skills to help others develop.

And it is gratifying that most of my friends and (former) colleagues – right across the age range – are doing the same thing, albeit in their own, very different, ways.

Another Orchid

No not another new plant — I don’t think I have room for more! — but another photo of one my existing plants.

Phalaenopsis Orchid

This is the orchid my mother gave me last year after it had flowered, and which I’ve managed to get back into flower. It is absolutely amazing. There are 13 flowers on this one stem with a couple of bids still to open — and it’s been in flower now for about 8 weeks.

Buggered Britain 8

Another in my occasional series documenting some of the underbelly of Britain. Britain which we wouldn’t like visitors to see and which we wish wasn’t there. The trash, abused, decaying, destitute and otherwise buggered parts of our environment. Those parts which symbolise the current economic malaise; parts which, were the country flourishing, wouldn’t be there, would be better cared for, or made less inconvenient.

Buggered Britain 8
Click the image for larger views

These two properties are in London’s Piccadilly, on the edge of Mayfair and right opposite Green Park. The mansion on the left is the former premises of the Naval & Military Club (nicknamed the In & Out); it is apparently owned by an Arab but appears unoccupied and very neglected. I don’t know the history of the commercial premises on the right although it appears to have been the premises of a Middle Eastern bank. But both properties have been in this state for some years and are gradually falling into dereliction. Such a shame and a waste.

This is a composite of two shots take from the car while sitting in traffic.

Reasons to be Grateful: 26

Experiment, week 26. Continuing the experiment here are this week’s five things which have made me happy or for which I’m grateful.

  1. Half-Price Orchids. As previously blogged.
  2. Pork with Pesto. Also as previously blogged.
  3. Strawberries & Raspberries. Special treat for the weekend we bought some good English strawberries and raspberries. What a wonderful weekend breakfast.
  4. Sparrowhawk. As we arrived home yesterday afternoon the sparrowhawk darted across the road in front of us, obviously chasing after some hapless sparrow. It failed in its quest but we then had the delight of watching it gliding around for several minutes until it drifted away across the houses. So graceful in flight, and when they want so fast.
  5. Wellington Arch. As I mentioned earlier we visited the Wellington Arch at Hyde Park Corner earlier today. Super views from the balcony including looking up at the Quadriga’s black bronze horses and down on the Household Cavalry (today the Blues & Royals) riding their equally black horses back to barracks after changing the guard at Horse Guards in Whitehall.