… what have amused me recently.
Time for Some Cartoons …
Quotes …
Another in our occasional series of quotes encountered recently which interested or amused us …
Northland College Principal John Tapene has offered the following words from a judge who regularly deals with youth:
‘Always we hear the cry from teenagers “What can we do, where can we go?”
‘My answer is this: Go home, mow the lawn, wash the windows, learn to cook, build a raft, get a job, visit the sick, study your lessons, and after you’ve finished, read a book. Your town does not owe you recreational facilities and your parents do not owe you fun.
‘The world does not owe you a living, you owe the world something. You owe it your time, energy and talent so that no one will be at war, in sickness and lonely again. In other words, grow up, stop being a cry baby, get out of your dream world and develop a backbone not a wishbone. Start behaving like a responsible person. You are important, you are needed. It’s too late to sit around and wait for somebody to do something someday. Someday is now and that somebody is you!’
[Source unknown]
To pretend, I actually do the thing: I have therefore only pretended to pretend.
[Jacques Derrida]
Faith is believing something you know ain’t true.
[Mark Twain]
It is well enough that people of the nation do not understand our banking and monetary system, for if they did, I believe there would be a revolution before tomorrow morning.
[Henry Ford]
Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.
[Will Durant]
Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
[Rick Cook]
Reasons to be Grateful: 39
Experiment, week 39. Well here we are again. Another week has gone round. Where did it go to? And so it’s time to document the five things which have made me happy or for which I’m grateful this week.
- Ultra-Sound Scan. On Monday I had to go to Hammersmith Hospital for an ultra-sound scan, because I have a lump where I shouldn’t have one (and where only 50% of us can have one). I went early in case I got stuck in all the extra traffic due to these wretched Olympic Games. I had a 10.40 appointment; I left home at 08.20 and was home again by 10.20 having stopped for a leisurely coffee after the scan. The scan was of course quick, simple and painless — and no it didn’t bother me in the least. Even better I got the all clear. If everything the NHS did was as good and efficient as this we’d have nothing to bitch about.
- Retsina & Mousaka. On Wednesday, early in the evening, I had a meeting at West Ealing. As one of our favourite restaurants, Retisna & Mousaka, is close by, and so are our friends Sue & Ziggy, we took the opportunity of grabbing our them and their two boys for a social evening. I wouldn’t normally do this mid-week but as it’s the school holidays there’s no harm the boys being a bit later to bed than usual. Needless to say there was plenty of very enjoyable food, drink and chat.
- Ely Cathedral. Fortunately we weren’t too late home on Wednesday evening as we were up at crack of something on Thursday for a day trip around some of the Cambridgeshire villages where my g-g-grandmother and her ancestors originated. One of them is Soham, which is a nice, quiet, small country town a few miles south of Ely. So of course, as we had the time, we had to go into Ely and spend an hour or so in the cathedral. I think Ely is one of my favourite cathedrals. The octagonal lantern tower is just such an amazing structure, built entirely of wood. It is visible across the fens for miles around, the more so as the cathedral stands on a slight hill (once an island in the marshes). Overall the villages weren’t amazing interesting, but the fenland is lovely and Ely is just a delight.
- Nutty-Seedy Bread. I’ve probably written about this before, but once or twice a week Noreen makes bread with seeds in. Usually a mix of pumpkin seed and pine nuts. So much nicer then plain, even if it is relatively expensive!
- Oak Bush Cricket. Last evening I spotted an Oak Bush Cricket in the bathroom. We usually get the odd one in the house at this time of year. They’re 2-3cm long, bright green with yellow legs. Yes they live mostly on oak trees and they fly quite, jump and walk quite smartly backwards as well as forwards. I didn’t manage to photograph this one as it stayed out of range on the ceiling, but you can see from the photo above (which I took two years ago) that they are absolutely amazing tiny pieces of engineering. Stunning!
Anthony Powell's London Calendar 2013
The latest Anthony Powell Society publication is now available. All the photographs were specially taken by me.
Details on the AP News Weblog.
Gallery : Sport
This week’s theme for Tina’s Gallery is Sport.
Surprisingly, given my interest in, and playing of, cricket, hockey and squash in my youth I don’t have a lot of sporty photos. Well not having kids and having had to watch them play football/rugby means I haven’t had that excuse.
So here are a couple from the archives, neither of which was take by me, but I’m in both.
Click the image for a larger view on Flickr
This is University of York Cricket Club Tour, July 1971. This group photo was taken at Sidney Sussex College sports ground, Cambridge. As I recall we played there, at the Ley’s School, HMS Ganges (near Ipswich) and at Felixstowe. GOK what I was doing on the tour as I was the worst cricketer of the squad by a distance. I can’t remember many of the names now (although they are all on the original), but I’m third from the right in the back row, with glasses and an urgent need of a haircut.
And this second one is a couple of years earlier in summer 1969.
Click the image for a larger view on Flickr
This is my school (Cheshunt Grammar School) 1st XI vs Cheshunt Cricket Club, at Cheshunt Cricket Club. I think this was taken by the photographer of the local paper and there is an original copy in my files. Thanks to several contacts I’ve now managed to put names to everyone whose face is visible. I’m the guy in the white cap looking at the ground. The man at the rear in front of the white trellis is Roger Clark who was our games master — and a damn fine cricketer too.
Even if I was a crap cricketer (I was never really more than club 3rd XI standard) they were happy days and I greatly enjoyed both playing and umpiring. I do miss that, but I don’t miss the agro which came into club cricket in the 80s as a result of everyone having to play in some league or other — that’s when I got out.
Did You Miss … ?
Another in our irregular collections of links to interesting or amusing items you may have missed.
It is still amazing how little we know about the natural world. With the advent of very miniaturised electronics and batteries scientists are now able to track bird migrations in detail. And there are surprises, like this cuckoo going the wrong way round Africa.
Meanwhile back on dry land in our rivers there’s an increasing suggestion that bringing back beavers would reduce flooding. There are pilot releases already in place, and the beavers are doing well enough to breed regularly.
And talk of beavers reminds me of the recent story that some medieval underwear has been unearthed in an Austrian castle. There’s a second, follow-up, report here. It’ll be interesting to see if the dating evidence actually holds up.
But then the medieval male obviously needed the underwear to hold their padding as it seems erectile dysfunction was as common then as now.
Coming back to earth with another bump, this church in Fulham is in desperate need of funds to repair its 15th century clock tower — which featured i the film The Omen — and keep the bells ringing.
Which brings us nicely to a couple of London items …
Mapping various aspects of London seems to be all the rage at the moment with the recent availability of Londoners’ life expectancy plotted on the tube map and a map of the capital’s most frequent surnames (use the slider to find the first to fifteenth most common names) by area. There are lots more interesting London maps at mappinglondon.co.uk
Finally, it seems that London could well soon get a new model of black cab. If the fuel efficiency and emissions figures hold up I’m guessing it’ll pretty quickly displace the iconic TX4 taxicab.
Quotes about Cats
Good quotes seem to be slow arriving at the moment. Maybe they’re like London buses and there will the three along in 5 minutes time. Meanwhile I thought we’d have a few quotes about my favourite animal: the Cat.
Who can believe that there is no soul behind those luminous eyes.
Theophile Gautier
There are people who reshape the world by force or argument, but the cat just lies there, dozing, and the word quietly reshapes itself to suit his comfort and convenience.
Allen & Ivy Dodd
I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior.
Hippolyte Taine
I love cats because I enjoy my home; and little by little, they become its visible soul.
Jean Cocteau
No amount of time can erase the memory of a good cat, and no amount of masking tape
can ever totally remove his fur from your couch.
Leo Dworken
Cats’ hearing apparatus is built to allow the human voice to easily go in one ear
and out the other.
Stephen Baker
Cats are mysterious kind of folk. There is more passing in their minds than we are aware of.
Sir Walter Scott
The cat is a dilettante in fur.
Theophile Gautier
Reasons to be Grateful: 38
Experiment, week 38. So here we go, another week completed in the continuing experiment documenting five things which have made me happy or for which I’m grateful this week. We’ll soon be two-thirds of the way through the experiment.
- Willem Van De Velde and …
- The Wallace Collection this week produced the first two of selections. More on both here.
- Queen’s Head & Artichoke. After we’d been to the Wallace Collection, Noreen and I pottered off (in a taxi) to the Artichoke for lunch. We had a selection of their tapas: Prawn & Scallop Skewers, Whitebait, Chorizo and Lentils, Cannellini Bean Salad and Patatas Bravas. This is an excellent gastro pub in Albany Street, NW1, very close to Great Portland Street and Regent’s Park tube stations. I can’t believe I’ve not written about it before as we use it both for ourselves and for some Anthony Powell Society functions (it is close to Powell’s former Chester Gate home). The menu is always interesting: a good selection of starters, main courses and puddings and on the other side a whole range of tapas; you can mix and match anyhow you like as long as you don’t want standard pub food. The food, beer, wine and service are always good and friendly; the manager is a characterful Frenchman (certainly Francophone with a wonderful Inspector Clouseau accent). They are always willing to try to accommodate allergies: we have one friend who is vegetarian and allergic to dairy, and they were quite happy to quickly adapt a risotto for her. And it isn’t expensive, especially for central London. The only downside is that if it’s full the main bar can be a bit noisy, but if you’re eating there is always the upstairs restaurant area. I have to thank our friend Jeff Manley for finding it on one of his transatlantic trips to London! Everyone we’ve taken there has liked it.
- Waitrose Chorizo Sausages. These were one of last week’s finds as they were on offer. Eaten cold between bread for lunch. Mmmmm!
- Strawberry & Gooseberry Crumble. Friday’s trip to the supermarket found lots of fresh strawberries and gooseberries leaping into our trolley. They were destined for a favourite crumble: gooseberry and strawberry — yes, it really does work! I cooked the fruit a bit first, with just a tablespoon of sugar and a small slug of apricot brandy. This was then topped with crumble and given a 10 minute burst in our combi oven. What an excellent way to start Sunday morning: a bowl of G&S Crumble** and Custard.
** G&S Crumble. An interesting addition to the Savoy Cabbage operas.
A Rich Seam
The “Feedback” column in the latest edition of New Scientist (dated 4 August) mines a rich seam of amusements.
First there is an item reporting some mathematical work in pointless topology, which is what most of us thought about higher mathematics anyway.
There is an item reporting a conference call for papers as specifying All papers and presentations must be incomprehensible English, as would be expected at a technical conference.
And there’s a product description for a solar light which is ideal for areas where conversational electrical supply is not available.
This is followed by an amusing reference to the Large Hadron Kaleidoscope.
Finally I have to give you this piece in full as a masterpiece of lateral thinking:
Talk about units in Feedback reminds Tony Emerson of a story from “the 1950s or 60s” about “a scientist working in one of the atomic establishments”. This person got fed up with directives to use different systems of units — those based on the centimetre, gram and second; those semi-officially based on the metre, kilogram and second; and the very official units of the International Standards Organization. So they reported pressures in stones per acre.
The stone is a traditional English measure of the weight of people or grain — 14 pounds or 6.35 kg — and an acre, a unit of area, is 4047 square metres. As Tony says, stones per acre would be “the original agricultural unit” of crop yield. Its application to atomic research doesn’t bear thinking about.
Inspired!
Quote : Harlots
Every harlot was a virgin once.
[William Blake, Innocence]