Category Archives: amusements

Auction Odities

We’ve not had a collection of oddities from our local auction house recently as the sales over the summer have been relatively ordinary. But I’ve kept the best from the last two which together with the current sale make an impressive selection of lots, both weird and wonderful. My heart sinks when I read “An interesting lot …”, “A charming …”, “A spectacular …” or “etc.” in a description! And so much just provokes the reaction “Why?”.
As usual each of these items is a single lot and the text exactly as in the auction catalogue.
A calendar illustration in watercolour for the month of August, featuring a ghillie and his laird atop a white fell pony, in the round
Eleven 20th century oils, mainly unframed, including a woman on a bench signed Kamen, two studies of naked men, a small portrait, Anthony and Cleopatra signed Jack Leslie, etc.; together with a framed woodcut, two unframed watercolours, and a reproduction print of an erotic female in two parts
A large chunk of amethyst crystal, decoratively mounted with miniature metal figures of miners, a donkey, and a ladder


A charming brass-framed glazed miniature display cabinet, containing six Volkstedt porcelain figures of gambolling cherubs …
A rare fuel gauge housing from a DH4 Liberty bi-plane, now silver-plated as a photograph frame …
Three decorative wooden cars, a collection of religious items including crosses and figurines, Egyptian figurines, decorative tray, a small quantity of brassware, a stein etc.
A large wicker hamper, a Moet & Chandon top hat ice bucket plus another similar, a Sundridge fishing rod, a red vintage telephone, a wind up gramophone to be restored, a table top spinning wheel and a violin etc.
Ten vintage leather baseball gloves dating from the 1930’s onwards
A large ornate didgeridoo
A wooden inlaid fire screen, a pair of mounted buffalo horns and an oval shaped bevelled glass mirror
Four decorative vintage gnomes – two modelled as planters
A turn of the century mounted servants bell board and a WW2 gas mask
A large solid block of beeswax
Two heavy duty camera cases, two garden ornaments of a hare and a frog, a silver plated photograph frame and golf balls
Miscellanea, including a tambourine, draughtsman’s set, Victorian jigsaw puzzle, Mauchline ware box, anniversary clock, two smoothing irons, dominoes, etc.
Five decorative scatter cushions and three angel doll candle holders
A spectacular modern Indian silver sculpture of Michael Jackson, standing with arms raised on hexagonal base inscribed with his name and dates “1958-2009” picked out in gold, the underside inscribed “Commissioned by Hobd/Ref 0912002/Made in India/House of Billa Dhand/T999”, height 54 cm, presumed 999 pure, approximately 125 ozt, with fitted box
A collection of 21 African carved wood masks in various sizes, together with a pottery seated figure in pre-Columbian style
Three cameras comprising a Zeiss Ikon Cronos, a Kodak Kodan and a Kodak Brownie, an Italian red glazed table lamp and ashtray, a WW1 riding crop, two copper and brass horns, a Picqout ware tea service on tray, an Imari bowl, a metal and leather chess set and board, an AA car badge, a quantity of books and a vintage tape recorder etc.
Two Victorian ladies’ writing [sic] crops, one with gilt-metal dog-head finial, the other silver-mounted
Two large African carved wood figures, one in apparently European clothing, the head indented to form a bowl … the other of a woman with baby
A pair of Yoruba carved wood fertility stools, 39 cm high, and two pairs of Ibeje figures, 35 and 26 cm, the smaller with bead and fibre clothing
A late Victorian Derby porcelain yellow-ground jar gilt with foliage, together with two painted miniature birds, probably in bone with wood stands, and a plastic kangaroo
A magnificent Japanese carved bone sword of impressive size, decorated overall with warriors and formal ornament, Meiji period, 132 cm long
Four 19th Century heavy copper frying pans and a heavy copper saucepan by Smiths Matthews, Bloomsbury, a roll of bits, a 19th Century winder, a quantity of vintage tools including a spoke shave, a canal art watering can and a quantity of new French door handles
Six western cowboy hats including two black felt by Resistol and MHT, two tan suede by Romero and The Outback Hat, and two straw

A Mamod steam-driven Edwardian model fire engine
Two handsome vintage soda siphons one with gold mesh cover, three antique wooden planes, a vintage German mincer, two wood and brass magazine racks and a novelty miniature gramophone
A Novum sewing machine a wood and brass set of scales, a silver plated sugar casket, a Spong mincer and music stand

19 random facts about me that may surprise people.

Someone amongst my friends posted this on Facebook the other day, so here’s my take …

  1. Do you make your bed everyday? No.
  2. What’s your favourite​ number? The one that wins me the lottery.
  3. What is your dream job? In my dreams I have many jobs, most of them stupid.
  4. If you could, would you go back to school? No, but I’d love to go back to being a post-graduate and do it properly.
  5. Can you parallel park? No – never could, never will.
  6. A job you had which people would be shocked that you had? Boning sides of bacon.
  7. Do you think aliens are real? Yes, if they exist.
  8. Can you drive a stick shift? No, the only thing I can drive is other people mad.
  9. Guilty pleasure? Yes, please.
  10. Tattoos? Not yet.
  11. Things people do that drive you insane? Not thinking.
  12. Fears? Illness, death and financial insecurity.
  13. Favourite childhood game? Were there any?
  14. Do you talk to yourself? No, only my stupid PC, everyone else answers back.
  15. Do you like doing puzzles? Except for the occasional crossword, no.
  16. Favourite music? Pretty much anything before Bach or late-60s/early-70s. But silence is golden.
  17. Tea or Coffee? Tea. I drink coffee about once a month and always wonder why I bothered.
  18. First thing you remember you wanted to be when you grew up? Scientist.

No I’m not tagging anyone, but join in if you want to.

Ten Things

Here we are again with his month’s off-the-wall ten things …
Ten Concepts I Try to Live by:

  1. Treat others as you would wish to be treated yourself
  2. If it harm none, do as you will
  3. Nude when possible, clothed when necessary
  4. Gender, colour, race etc. are irrelevant to ability and worth
  5. Sex and nudity are normal
  6. Openness and honesty in all things
  7. Say what you mean and do what you say
  8. Don’t worry about things you can’t change
  9. Pro bono publico, nil bloody panico
  10. Zen Mischief

Middle-aged?

I spotted this somewhere the other day. I feel sure it’s been around for a while, but it made me chuckle.
How to know when you’re Middle-Aged:

  1. You don’t understand what young peasants are talking about
  2. You struggle to read Chaucer in weak candlelight
  3. You hate rowdy taverns
  4. You constantly worry that you might have the Black Death
  5. You don’t know or care who Blondel is sleeping with
  6. You tell your wife that Crusaders seem to look younger every year
  7. You struggle with new technology such as the heavy plough and the longbow.
  8. You find Gothic architecture too modern
  9. You keep forgetting who the King is
  10. You dream of buying a second hovel in France