Now I know I’m getting old. No amend that. I really am well past it!
I’ve been noticing for some time that I’ve not always been hearing everything people say clearly — especially when the person in question is Noreen. So far so normal; we know men never hear anything their wives say! But I was also struggling more and more to hear people talking to me across the table in a noisy restaurant or pub.
A couple of months back, Boots were offering a free, quick hearing test. So I said “yes” and the result was that they said I have noticeable, though not severe, age-related hearing loss. But they would, wouldn’t they! They are in the business of selling expensive hearing aids.
So rather than go their expensive route unnecessarily I went to my GP, who referred me to the local NHS audiology service.
(Our local audiology service is provided by a private company, In Health, as Ealing and Harrow both contract services to “any qualified provider”. They operate out of several local clinics rather than the local hospitals.)
Finally I got to see the audiology people this morning for a much more thorough test — which is all I was expecting to happen. And yes, I do have quite significant drop off in my hearing at middle to high frequencies, which is typical of age-related hearing loss.
Well taht was no real surprise as there is age-related deafness on both sides of my family, as well as my aunt (father’s kid sister) having, I think, had hearing aids since her 40s.
So I have joined the family club with hearing aids!
WHHAAATTTT!!!!
Yes, I have hearing aids!
I really wasn’t expecting that! I was expecting either “you have hearing loss, but it isn’t bad; come for another test in two years” or “yes you need hearing aids, come back in 2 weeks for another appointment and further assessment”. But no, it was “I can do this for you now”.
I’m not sure I really need hearing aids yet, but the advice was that it is better to start with them now, and get used to them, rather than struggle with them later when I really do need them. Exactly the opposite of having glasses.
So I agreed. Because one thing I am determined about is not becoming an awkward old git who denies that they can’t hear, or see, or need help. I remember my parents moaning about their parents being obstinate. And then I watched my parents do exactly the same things my grandparents did! I am determined not to go there. If I do, you have permission to shoot me.
What was amazing about this morning’s appointment was the efficiency of it all — apart from the fact that I was very early and was kept waiting until my appointment time which was tedious but understandable. Then in a 45 minute appointment the young lady tested my hearing quite thoroughly and explained the results. She discussed with me the need for hearing aids. Tried which type fitted me best and she dispensed the hearing aids there and then — setting them up and programming them for me, showing me how they worked, etc.
I find it incredible that such tiny “in the ear” bud-type hearing aids (that’s them on the right, sitting on a 50p piece) can not only contain their tiny battery, and all the audio equipment, but that they are programmable down a thin wire from a PC.
OK the hearing aids are obviously still fairly basic ones, and not adjustable by me, as that’s likely all I need at present. But all this is on the NHS and free of charge. Which I find quite extraordinary. OK yes, that’s maybe how it should be, but I would not have expected at this stage of hearing loss to have qualified for free hearing aids.
When I got home, Noreen was equally incredulous. She has been complaining for a couple of years that I don’t hear what she says to me, but when I told her I had hearing aids, her comment was “Why? You’re not that deaf!”
So there you are … To add to the already old, blind and daft, I’m now deaf as well.
All posts by Keith
Something for the Weekend
Sports Disgust
First of all the retailer Sports Direct bans a mother from breastfeeding her child in their Nottingham store.
Then when a group of mothers protest outside their Ealing store (as mothers apparently have been around the country) the staff gratuitously photograph them and call the police.
Now I admit I do not know all the ins and outs of this case, just what has been reported by Ealing Today, but this seems like a disgraceful over-reaction by Sports Direct.
Oddity of the Week: Drinking Party
On the edge of a forest track, I crouched briefly to admire some lovely red campions.
But as I stood up, a can of Special Brew plummeted to the ground from somewhere above me. I looked up, half-expecting to see a jeering gang of adolescent boys, only to catch sight of a grey squirrel scampering up a nearby tree. He was carrying another can of the iconic beverage, so distinctive in its unique gold and crimson livery.
Was it a heat-induced mirage, I wondered? Had the crazy weather finally got to me? No: Sarah had seen the squirrel too, and pointed the animal out as he clambered into the canopy. We wondered if he might be using the can as building material for a drey — perhaps he’d picked up a tip from watching Grand Designs.
On closer inspection, we could make out three more squirrels together among the branches, and noticed several more empties at the base of the trunk — someone must have thrown them away. When the first squirrel reached his friends, he perched the can horizontally so that the dregs started to spill out. All four vied to drink the beer, arguing and scrapping noisily over this not-quite-amber nectar. One of his mates scrambled down the trunk to select another can from the ground. The squirrel was about to take a swig … when he noticed us for the first time. He alerted the trio above with his distinctive chirping alarm call, and the whole gang scarpered. Suddenly it was just us again, and that pile of tinnies.
I was telling a friend about our close encounter of the furry kind a few days later, who mentioned that he’d once seen a squirrel slurping out of a Coke can. He’d assumed that it was because of the sugars in the drink, and thought the same could be true of beer … the incident certainly provoked a few chuckles. We’d seen a young gang of 21st-century invaders out boozing, scavenging empties that could well have been left by wayward teens.
From: Stu Bullen; “The Booze Brothers”; BBC Wildlife Magazine; March 2014
Word: Bindlestiff
Bindlestiff
A hobo, especially one who carries a bedroll.
According to the OED a bindle (which is American slang) is “a bundle containing clothes and possessions, especially a bedding-roll carried by a tramp”. Hence a bindleman or bindlestiff, is a tramp who carries such a bundle.
Weekly Photograph
This week’s photograph is a recent, simple one: flowers on the Horse Chestnut trees by A406 at Ealing Common. It was taken from the car while at traffic lights.
Horse Chestnut Flowers
Ealing; April 2014
Tasse de Dégustation
A couple of months ago I acquired from a friend four tastevin (or tasse de dégustation, tasse du vin, wine cups, depending on your predilection). My friend had bought them in northern France and cleaned them up before passing them on to me in exchange for a few drinking tokens.
They are all of the same standard design with bowls 75mm in diameter and have the crest of Bouchard Aîné & Fils, a recognised Beaune wine house. All appear to be white metal plating over a yellow metal base, the latter showing through where the white plating is rubbed. The base metal is therefore likely to be brass (or possibly some form of pewter).One of the four is clearly silver plated as it has a small stamp “METAL ARGENTE” (the French indication of silver plate) on the bowl near the handle. Two are stamped just “METAL”. The fourth has a tiny (2mm) square maker’s mark of M and P with what appears to be an upward pointing arrow between the letters — I have not been able to satisfactorily identify this maker. As far as I can see there are no other marks. The two “METAL” ones have a very slightly greyer/duller lustre than the other two, which makes me suspect they are maybe tin plated, the brighter two both being silver — but that is pure speculation on my part.
This fourth, with the maker’s mark, is noticeably the most worn, with more yellow metal showing through, so it looks as if it may have been someone’s favourite. The stamping of the crest is also of a slightly better quality, so this one could be older.
Looking further at the wear on the handle of this one with a maker’s mark, two further things become apparent: (a) there is a slight wear mark where the tasse would have been worn on string/ribbon round a sommelier’s neck (in fact all four have this) and (b) the wear on the crest suggests that the sommelier was right handed.
Nonetheless I doubt any of them is of any significant age.
I have no expectation that they are of any useful monetary value but nonetheless I’m interested to work out their provenance. I have written to Bouchard Aîné & Fils asking if they can date them or provide other information, but I have so far not received a reply.
If anyone can shed further light on them, then I would love to hear from you.
Meanwhile they are nice little things to have!
Your Interesting Links
Interesting items seem to be coming thick and fast at the moment, so here’s another instalment of links to items you may have missed. And not so much boring science stuff this time!
Apocalypse? So what would happen if all our satellites fell from the sky? Yep, apocalypse may not be far off the mark!
Do you wear glasses? Or lenses? Ever wondered whether you could see without them? You can. Here’s how. And it really does work!
The strange story of a tetragametic woman — that’s someone made from four gametes (two eggs, two sperm) rather than the usual two. This is a form of chimerism and as chimeras are normally detected only because of external abnormalities (for example differently coloured eyes) we don’t really know how common it is.
We know the phases of the moon influence the behaviour of many creatures from big cats to owls, but how much does the moon affect human behaviour?
An interesting short read on saffron, that brightly coloured spice from crocus flowers.
While on plants, this stunning piece of sculpture was carved into an olive stone in 1737.
And so to religion … here’s an interesting evolutionary tree of religion.
Allegedly the human mind is primed to believe in god. If so, how is it that atheism is on the rise?
Meanwhile archaeologists have been staring into the mists of time and come to the conclusion that Britain’s oldest settlement is Amesbury, near Stonehenge, in Wiltshire. Doesn’t seem too surprising to me.
An American mother takes a very sensible look at nudity and how it does not cause any problems for kids.
And to finish on our usual theme of sexuality, here’s a considered response to the Nordic conception of controlling prostitution from a Canadian sex worker.
These final two items may not be safe for those of a pathetically puritanical mind; they are included here in the interests of normalising our attitudes to sex and sexuality.Girl on the Net asks whether blowjobs are anti-feminist. Spoiler: No, because feminism is a state of mind not an attribute of “things”.
And really finally, with the spotlight on Girl on the Net, here’s an interview with her in the University of York student newspaper, York Vision (it was called Nouse in my day!).
Special Salmon
Another culinary triumph from our kitchens. At first sight it sounds fairly ordinary, but the little touches made it really yummy …
Zen Salmon Wellington
This serves two, generously.
You need:
2 100g salmon fillets
4 scallops (with coral)
1 pack chilled puff pastry
juice ½ lemon
butter
fresh black pepper and dill herb (optional)
egg or milk to glaze
What you do:
1. Pre-heat the oven to 200°C (with fan, 220°C if no fan) and line a baking sheet with some baking parchment.
2. Halve the pastry and roll out each piece to make an oblong about 10×12″.
3. Rinse the salmon fillets and scallops.
4. If the salmon fillets have a long thin edge, cut half this off and just fold it over so the piece is smaller and of more even thickness.
5. Place a fillet on each piece of pastry, and two scallops on each fillet.
Top each with a good knob of butter and a teaspoon of lemon juice; plus if you wish pepper and dill.
6. Dampen the edges of the pastry with more lemon juice, fold over and crimp the edges sealed.
7. Cut a couple of slashes in the top of each wellington and glaze with egg or milk.
8. Bake for about 30 minutes.
9. Serve with salad or lightly steamed veg — we had plain steamed English asparagus with a knob of butter.
It is simple. But the lemon juice is what makes this, adding an unusual tang to the pastry. And the scallops add that touch of luxury.
Something for the Weekend
Not a cartoon as such, but just something which amused me earlier in the week …
