All posts by Keith

I’m a controversialist and catalyst, quietly enabling others to develop by providing different ideas and views of the world. Born in London in the early 1950s and initially trained as a research chemist I retired as a senior project manager after 35 years in the IT industry. Retirement is about community give-back and finding some equilibrium. Founder and Honorary Secretary of the Anthony Powell Society. Chairman of my GP's patient group.
amusements, ramblings

The Amusements of 2014

A review of 2014 in things that have amused me during the year.
Product of the Year
In third place we have these magnificent Magical Unicorn Slippers
In second place, is something I find slightly disturbing: Cussons Mum & Me Bump Smooth & Glow Pregnancy Shampoo


But the winner is the Chinese Automatic Sperm Extractor as installed in a Nanjing hospital.

 

Auction Item of the Year (from our local auction house)
In third place we have: a set of 25 antique glass eyes in fitted case.


In second place: A Second World War papier-mâché helmet .
But pride of place must go to: An old French roll of loo paper.

 

Name of the Year
Two names stood out for me this year, and I can’t decide between them:
Rev Nims Obunge — a non-conformist minister from Tottenham.
Patriarch Moran Mor Ignatius Zakka I Iwas, Supreme Head of the Universal Syriac Orthodox Church who died on 21 March this year.

 

Best Named Organisation of the Year goes to the US National Fenestration Rating Council who were mentioned in the 12 April edition of New Scientist.

 

Best Oxymoron
Again we have two contenders.
Finest quality recycled paper, which is the proud boast on the paper towel dispenser in the toilet at my doctors’ surgery.
And the Vegan butcher’s shop which has opened recently in New York.

 

Recipe of the Year
This is one from the archives: Christmas Candle Salad


Just what were they thinking?!??!

 

Book Titles
These are books I’ve come across (don’t ask!) during the year rather than books published during the year. Again there are several contenders, none of which, I hasten to add, have I read:
The Jewish-Japanese Sex & Cook Book and How to Raise Wolves by Jack Douglas (1972)
Rossetti’s Wombat: Pre-Raphaelites and Australian Animals in Victorian London by John Simons (2008)
You’ve Had Worse Things in Your Mouth Cookbook by Billi Gordon (1986)
But the winner has to be:
Harlequin: Prince Cherrytop and the Good Fairy Fuck, a Pantomime by George Augustus Sala (circa 1877)

 

Best Academic Paper Title
There was really only ever going to be one contender here. The prize has to go to a paper about stopping nose-bleeds with bacon, which deservedly won on IgNobel Prize:
Nasal packing with strips of cured pork as treatment for uncontrollable epistaxis in a patient with Glanzmann thrombasthenia which is available on PubMed.

 

Headline
There have been just so many wonderful headlines during the year, but I managed to whittle the list down to these three:
‘Penis soup is something I’ll treasure for ever’: Adventurer Simon Reeve reveals the most stomach-churning dishes he’s encountered, Independent, 2 February
Warwickshire man nose-pushes Brussels sprout up Snowdon, BBC News, 2 August
But by a short head the winner is
Mick Jagger has 19-million-year-old species of ‘long-legged pig’ named after him, Guardian, 11 September

 

Best Named Animal
Magistrate Armhook Squid (Berryteuthis magister)

 

Sport of the Year
Again there are three contenders:
Wheelchair Curling — I still can’t work out how you get curling tongs large enough.
Underwater rugby, BBC News, 24 May
But best of all was Penny farthing bicycle polo, again BBC News, 24 May

 

Best Research Project
What Happens When You Play Music Through A Squid?

 

And finally …
Best Tweet
Yellow snow warning for Wales, @BBCNews on Twitter, 26 December
I guess the culprit must be all those sheep!

 

Let me know your favourite amusements of the year — and don’t forget to start collecting for 2015!

history, photography

Weekly Photograph

This week another from our trip, last May, round Oxfordshire villages in search of ancestors. This archway — which looks to be Tudor in date — is in a hedge across the middle of the graveyard of Churchill’s old church. It really does just lead from one piece of churchyard to another and appears to be of absolutely no significance, beyond being rather splendid.

Archway to Nowhere
Archway to Nowhere
Churchill, Oxfordshire; May 2014
Clink the image for larger views on Flickr

uncategorized

Book Review: Gilbertine Rite

Reginald Maxwell Woolley
The Gilbertine Rite. Volume I Containing (i) the Ordinal and (ii) the Office of St Gilbert
Henry Bradshaw Society, 1921; digitally remastered 2010
Reginald Maxwell Woolley
The Gilbertine Rite. Volume II Containing (i) the Kalendar and (ii) the Missal
Henry Bradshaw Society, 1922; digitally remastered 2010
These are two somewhat esoteric (print-on-demand) paperback volumes which have been on my wanted list for several years and which I was given for Christmas.
The Gilbertines were an interesting monastic order, founded on a Cistercian model in 1130 by St Gilbert of Sempringham — Sempringham in Lincolnshire being their head house. They were the only entirely English monastic order, ultimately with 26 houses which survived until the Dissolution of the Monasteries in the 16th century — whereupon Robert Holgate (right), the last Master of the Order became Bishop of Llandaff and in 1545 Archbishop of York.
The Gilbertines are interesting also because most of their monastic houses were mixed, although the monks and nuns did live in separate houses. It is also known from damage to the excavated skeletons of monks and from some of the few remaining records that the monks played football.
These two volumes reconstruct from several remaining medieval Gilbertine liturgical manuscripts the monastic rites of the Gilbertine Order. Volume I contains an introduction of some 45 pages which details the layout of the documents and discusses their dating in much detail.
The remainder of volume I and the whole of volume II (around 400 pages in total) consist of a straight transcription of the Latin text of the documents. There is no English translation, so one is reliant on one’s poor, 50 year old school Latin and some remaining knowledge of the rites of the Catholic Church to divine what is going on. And like all missals it takes quite a bit of working out what actually fits with what; nothing is linear and common sections appear just the once.
Have I read all of these two volumes? Well I’ve read the whole of the introduction, but sadly my Latin just isn’t good enough for the liturgy, although I have looked at large parts of the volumes and worked out roughly what’s going on.
They are really only for anyone with an interest in liturgy, the Gilbertines or medieval ecclesiastical history — and someone with a good grasp of medieval Latin.
Nevertheless they are nice, esoteric things to have!
Overall Rating (for the average reader): ☆☆☆☆☆
Overall Rating (for the specialist reader): ★★★★☆

links

Your Interesting Christmasy Links

Needless to say a lot of Christmas related links have appeared in the last week or so. Here’s a selection, with a few less Christmasy ones.
First one that is merely seasonal … five common misconceptions about ‘flu and why, especially if you’re at risk, you should get a ‘flu shot.
A little of the chemistry underlying what makes mulled wine so good.
Apparently we’re drinking Champagne out of the wrong glasses — something Champagne growers have always known!
Turkey has been our festive meat for much longer than we imagine — basically since quite soon after Columbus discovered the New World.
We’ve all heard of the Sugar Plum Fairy, but what are Sugar Plums anyway? Rebecca Rupp investigates.
Bourbon. The French Royal family? Biscuits? Whiskey? Well yes, all of those, but is there a connection?
The holly bears a berry. It also bears small flowers on separate male and female trees and is an important resource for wildlife — which is why we have several hollies in our garden.
Forks as eating implements are a recent introduction, at least compared with knives and spoons. Rebecca Rupp, again, looks at the history of both table manners and the fork.


It seems unlikely now, but there used to be quite a few pubs London Underground stations. I certainly remember the one at Sloane Square which survived until 1985, although I’m not sure I ever managed to have a pint there.
We’re now definitely descending into the rather less seasonal …
An official inquiry has highlighted the plight of British public libraries which are withering on the vine in the face of local authority funding cuts.
Most will have heard of Project Gutenberg but there are many other websites offering legal downloads of literature.
David Shariatmadari in the Guardian takes a sideways look at 10 diktats from Brussels that are (not?) ruining life in Britain.
We all know that life isn’t fair, but apparently that’s not the problem.
And finally, a splendid summary of why you should never mess with an engineer.
Happy New Year to you all!

personal, ramblings

Relaxing Christmas

Yes, we’ve had a nice relaxing day of presents, drink and food but without over-indulging.
Had a bit of a lie-in and got up about 9.30. Two mince pies and mug of tea for breakfast.
I rang my mother and had a quick chat with her; she’s in a care home 120 miles away so although we aren’t there she isn’t on her own.
j-jugAbout 11.30 we sat down with an extra large G&T (Noreen had a similarly large Bacardi & Coke) and opened our main presents. As always there was a fair amount of alcohol and quite a few books. But we always manage to find each other something unusual: this year I got Noreen a Jersey milk/cream jug — silver plate, pre-WWII and probably made for the tourist market, but a nice thing nonetheless.
After clearing up a bit we had our traditional Christmas Day lunch of smoked salmon sandwiches at about 1.30 (we have Christmas Dinner in the evening).
At 3-ish Noreen put a large leg of pork in the oven to roast; while I had a nap she went to see the old lady across the road (who is 90+ and on her own) for an hour or so.
Just after 5 we both got to work in the kitchen on the rest of dinner. Somehow we managed to avoid any alcohol in the process!
Dinner at about 7: Roast Pork, sausage, garlic potatoes, roast parsnips, sprouts, chestnut stuffing and apple sauce. Accompanied by a bottle of pink champagne (which also now one of our traditions). No need for starters or pudding; just a good main course.
After dinner we sat and opened presents part two which I accompanied with a glass of an unusual, rather nice and delicate rosé port Noreen had given me. The tradition from my family is to have small presents, from under the tree, in the evening — really just a little something to unwrap like a few chocs or a paperback book.
After that we sat reading for a bit and abhorring the available choices of TV viewing.
And shortly to bed, perhaps to read some more, maybe with another glass of something.
I think we’ll call that a good Christmas!

photography

Advent Calendar 24

An Advent Calendar
Some of Favourite Images from Other Photographers on Flickr
Click the image for larger views on Flickr and details of the photographer
Frosty rose
Note that this image is not mine and is copyright the original photographer
who may be identified by following the link to Flickr

words

Word: Wassail

Wassail
1. A salutation used when presenting a cup of wine to a guest, or drinking the health of a person (to which the correct reply is “drink-hail”) and thus by extension any general salutation.
2. The liquor in which healths were drunk and particularly the spiced ale used in Twelfth Night and Christmas Eve celebrations.
  
3. A custom observed on Twelfth Night and New Year’s Eve of drinking healths from the wassail-bowl and hence a carousal or riotous festivity.
4. A carol or drinking song sung by wassailers.
5. To drink to the health of fruit-trees, cattle etc. in wassail, in order to ensure their thriving — hence the tradition of wassailing apple trees.


According to the OED the word is first recorded in Geoffrey of Monmouth circa 1140. It derives from the Old Norse ves heill via the Old English wes hál, literally ‘be in good health’ or ‘be fortunate’ and the Middle English wæs hæil.