This post is about pornography and a couple of current fashions in same that I don’t understand. But first let’s get something fundamental out of the way …
What do I mean by pornography in this context? I mean the normal, relatively sane, heterosexual material which can be bought legally in the UK over the counter of the corner shop or licensed sex shop or found easily on the internet. I do not mean anything involving extreme violence, abuse, lack of consent, drugs, children, animals, unpleasant bodily excretions or anything illegal – none of which I would ever condone.
Yes, I admit it, I look at pornography. Well so what? I’m a normal red-blooded male, I still have a pulse and I’m a sexual libertarian (as long as it’s consensual). Most of us have seen (if not actively used) pornography at some point of our lives, with American research showing that almost 90% of young men and over 30% of young women actually use pornography – now translate that into how many have ever seen pornography. So it’s there, we all know it’s there, we all know what it contains and we all know that at the level I’m discussing it does next to bugger all harm.
Having cleared that up, can we now have an adult conversation about it, please?
So there are two things which seem to be fashionable in current pornography which I fail to understand, and which I would welcome someone knowledgeable explaining to me.
Firstly … Why does every female (and a significant minority of men too) have to have their pubic area clean shaven? Yes, it’s a fashion. It didn’t used to be this way. Look at porn images from 30-40 years ago and everyone is hairy. OK, I understand that the lack of hair gives a better view of the genitals, but that doesn’t require complete depilation. I also understand that depilated females are supposed to look younger and more virginal, but given the current concerns with child pornography I would have thought this is something most men (and women) would want to avoid! And I also know that some people prefer a lack of hair as it increases skin contact during sex. But that does not explain why 99% of females are significantly if not totally depliated. Yes by all means tidy the hairy bits up round the edges. We all get a haircut from time to time but we don’t all go around with our heads shaved, so why shave our pubes? What is it about our naturally hairy state that is so unacceptable? Is this something more than pure fashion? If so, why? I don’t get it.
Actually now I think about it I have a subsidiary question. Why is it that the majority of women appear to prefer non-hairy men. Many times I have heard girlies interviewed and give an “Eeeuuwwwww” reaction to the idea of a hairy man – particularly hairy chests and backs. What is it about hairy men that’s such a turn-off? Or again is this just fashion, perpetuated by the likes of the Chippendales?
OK, here’s my second question. One of most men’s dreams (GOK why) is being on the receiving end of fellatio given by some nubile sex goddess (or god). And of course this appears regularly as a pornographic image. But why, oh why, do the girls (I don’t look at the men!) performing the act always look at the camera and look bored? Oh, OK, they probably are bored. But wouldn’t it be a whole sight more erotic if they were concentrating on the job in hand and look as if they are enjoying it? Why must they look at the camera in that desultory way? Sure, eye contact is important to communication, but even at a time like this? Again, I don’t get it.
Now can anyone knowledgeable explain either of these phenomena, please? Are they just fashions or am I missing something deeper?
PS. If I start getting abusive comments they will be deleted, as will any comment which unnecessarily links to pornographic images. You are perfectly entitled to your opinion, and to express it, but you are not entitled to do so in an abusive way. My rules! OK?
My thoughts for what they're worth: I agree with your definition of pornography for a atart – anything else is just yuk – not to speak of illegal in many cases. I have no problems with normal ordinary pornography.Body hair – I would like to think it's just a fashion but I think it has more sinister connotations as well. I don't mind men being either hairy or not – but I prefer them natural. If they're naturally less hairy then that's fine and if they're naturally very hairy then that is equally ok with me. What I don't like is the artificially hairless look – reminds me too much of Barbie dolls.Adults have body hair – both male and female adults. To suggest that this is somehow unhygienic or nasty is to me very strange – almost perverted. What can be nasty about the natural human body? In pornography I suppose it's better because you can see more but I actually thought pornography was better years ago when people had body hair – if you can see everything there's no mystery.The sinister aspects: to me this is because of the associations with children. Children aren't sexual beings and one of the indications of that is a lack of body hair. To make adults look like children is to simulate in a semi-acceptable form sex with children.I dislike the fact that removing body hair has spilled over into mainstream fashion – to the extent that someone on a problem page can be told it is normal to remove pubic hair and she should get over herself and get with the fashion!! Now that is just outrageous to me.The boredom factor – they really are bored and no one employs a porn star for their acting ability!
@Jilly … Thanks as always for the comments. What you're saying about body hair is very much how I feel as well, and like you I have this horrible feeling that there is this sinister underlying child-a-like aspect to depilation – although I suspect (hope!) that with at least most people it isn't done consciously. It all goes along with using make-up to cover wrinkles, make cheeks redder etc. all of which is also designed to make women look pre(pubescent). I wouldn't say it's abnormal to remove body hair – the human race has been doing it, and using make-up, for thousands of years – but like you I find the notion that removal of body hair has become de rigeur, and is being peddled as such, rather worrying. The artificially hairless look? About as attractive as hairless cats and dogs, ie. NOT.