If he were still alive, my father would have been 98 a few days ago; he died almost 12 years ago at the age of 86. So this month’s Ten Things brings you …

Ten Things I Remember about My Father

1. He was useless at doing anything practical: I always say he had 20 left thumbs (and I inherited 10 of them). Whenever he mended something he ended up with a piece left over; a nut, a spring, a screw, a ball-bearing …
2. He was a conscientious objector in WWII. In consequence he spent a year working in University College Hospital, London as a dogsbody and the rest of the war working on the land. This was almost certainly the cause of his crocked, arthritic knees.
3. In the mid-1960s he was a Liberal local councillor and Chairman of the council’s Public Health Committee. During this time he was responsible for resolving a dustmen’s strike.
4. He never learnt to drive. He did start having lessons in the late-1950s but following a near accident was so shaken he never took his test. Consequently he cycled everywhere locally until he was about 75 when his crocked knees eventually stopped him – and this was long after his knees were stopping him walking much.
5. He religiously used the local public library; when I was a kid he went almost every Saturday morning, often taking me along. He was always reading – every evening and always on the train to/from work – so he got through several books a week.

My father hated being photographed, so this is one of the few photos I have of him.
He’s taking a pre-prandial snooze a few days before his 82nd birthday.
6. He thought computers were one of the biggest works of the Devil: unnecessary, soul-destroying and divisive; they would be end of civilised society. He never understood (or forgave) me working in the IT industry – I had sold out; I should have been an academic or a teacher, something worthwhile.
7. He was thrifty, even miserly, and guarded his money from everyone who he thought was out to charm it from his wallet. This was partly as a result of an impoverished childhood, partly a result of the war, and also because he saw it as his responsibility to ensure my mother wasn’t short of money after he died.
8. When I was about 7 he asked my primary school headmaster what he needed to do to ensure I got to grammar school. He was told “nothing” and that because I was always being encouraged to read etc., I would get to grammar school. That was one of the few outward manifestations of the (mostly covert) pressure put on me to succeed (and which may have been the root cause of my depression).
9. In many ways he was very liberal minded; for instance he viewed prostitution as a valuable social service which should be decriminalised.
10. He only ever gave me one piece of “fatherly advice”. I would have been about 17 (so in the late-60s) and had a steady girlfriend. His comment was “You’re old enough to know what it’s all about. I don’t care what you do, as long as you don’t have any bastards”.