I found the following alternative proverbs on the intertubes. They’re probably very old, but they amused me!
Don’t change horses until they stop running
Strike while the bug is close
It’s always darkest before Daylight Saving Time
Never underestimate the power of termites
You can lead a horse to water but how?
Don’t bite the hand that looks dirty
No news is impossible
A miss is as good as a Mr
You can’t teach an old dog new maths
If you lie down with dogs, you’ll stink in the morning
Love all, trust me
The pen is mightier than the pigs
An idle mind is the best way to relax
Where there’s smoke there’s pollution
Happy the bride who gets all the presents
A penny saved is not much
Two’s company, three’s the Musketeers
Don’t put off till tomorrow what you put on to go to bed
Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and you have to blow your nose
There are none so blind as Stevie Wonder
Children should be seen and not spanked or grounded
If at first you don’t succeed get new batteries
You get out of something only what you see in the picture on the box
When the blind lead the blind get out of the way
A bird in the hand is going to poop on you
Better late than pregnant
As always there is more than a grain of truth in many of them.
Well it’s time for another round-up of the strange and amusing from our local auction house.