Category Archives: amusements

Headlines of the Year

‘Tis the season for annual round-ups and “best of” series, so who am I not to join the party.

These must be amongst the best (worst?) and most amusing news headlines I’ve seen during 2011.

Rain causes increasing flood risk
BBC News; 16 January 2011

Men trust people more than women
BBC News(?); 09 May 2011

Children hurt by bouncy castle
BBC News; 29 May 2011

Primate apologises over comments
BBC News; 19 June 2011

Uranus Has a Bright New Spot
American Scientist; 04/11/2011

Custard’s Last Stand
The Times; 5 September 2011?

Do headline writers really have no sense of the ridiculous nor re-read what they write?

Anti-Carol

Just for further amusement at this time of great mirth and sadness at the tills, here are two anti-carols, again stolen from friends on Facebook.

O Sing, choirs of children,
Sing in expectation,
Sing all ye shareholders of M&S.
Give to our Family, glory in the Mostest;
O come, let us spend Money,
O come, let us spend Money,
O come, let us spend Money,
Christ I’m Bored.

God rest ye Unitarians, let nothing you dismay,
Remember there’s no evidence there was a Christmas Day,
When Christ was born just is not known, no matter what men say.

Glad tidings of reason and fact, reason and fact,
Glad tidings of reason and fact.

There was no star of Bethlehem, there was no angel song,
There could have been no wise men for the journey was too long,
The stories in the Bible are historically wrong.

Glad tidings of reason and fact, reason and fact,
Glad tidings of reason and fact.

Much of our Christmas custom comes from Persia and from Greece,
From solstice celebrations of the ancient middle east,
We know our so-called holiday is but a pagan feast.

Glad tidings of reason and fact, reason and fact,
Glad tidings of reason and fact.

Amusing Meme

One of my Facebook contacts has posted a curious and amusing little meme. It may be an old one, but I’ve not seen it before. It goes like this …

  1. Your real name: Keith Marshall
  2. Your detective name (favourite colour and favourite animal): Yellow Cat
  3. Your soap opera name (middle name and street you live on): Cullingworth Ennismore
  4. Your Star Wars name (first 3 letters of last name, first 2 of middle name, first 2 of first, last 3 of last): Marcu Keall
  5. Superhero name (Colour of your shirt and first item to your right): Null Mouse
  6. Goth name (black and name of one of your pets): Black Harry

Well the last three work fairly well; I have reservations about the rest.

Anyone else dare to try this and post the results?