Zen Mischief


Café Zen's Abominable Menu

Our almost award winning café!

"Unique and inexplicable"
Jonathan Smugg, What Bistro Magazine

Quick Snacks

Rollmop Herring & Custard Baguette
Saveloy & Strawberry Jam in a Bun
Chocolate Spread Crepes with Garlic Mustard
Marmite & Honey Waffles
Transylvanian Omelette

Soup of the Day: Cream of Vegetable & Old Sock


Jam and Radish Soup
Crunchy Lizard Paté
Eel and Banana Consommé
Dishwater à la Maison
Strangled Eggs
Cigarette Smoked Frogspawn
Potato Skins with a Period Chilli Dip
Shrimps with Malt & Cod Liver Oil Dip
Smoked Wasp Risotto

Main Courses

Beef Macramé
Smoked Haddock with Liquorice Sauce
Rack of Coat Tartare
Grub in the Hole
Scorched Salmon with Maple Syrup
Rattlesnake en Surprise
Toad in the Vole
Rhubarb & Garlic Omelette
Whole Small Garbage Can en Croute
Dill Pickle & Banana Salad with Hot Gravy Sauce

All main dishes are served with a choice of:
Unseasonable Vegetables    –    Hash Blacks    –    Silicon Chips
Sea Green Salad    –    Hot Larva Bread


Apple Shrewdel
Linctus Soufflé
Lemming Sponge Pudding
Gherkin and Pernod Ice-cream
Creme Catastrophe
Fresh Cherry Crepes with Syrup of Figs
Mermaid Tart and Cream
Nanny Ogg's Sticky Toffee Rat on a Stick